IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #show #information #crime #uk #year #summarise #features #comparisons
The pie chart and line graph provide information about
last
year
's
crime
 in the United Kingdom. Generally, both
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 chart and line graph compared the cause of the
crime
 committed in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
year
.
Firstly
, the table provides information about the correlation between age and
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
 of crimes. The x-axis shows the age range of
criminal
Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
between 12-60 years old. The group of ages with
most
Add an article
the most
a most
show examples
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
 committed was between 12-28 years old, the
crime
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 mostly committed by a 20 years old criminal with
80
Correct article usage
an 80
show examples
% rate of crimes.
While
 the criminal with age between 28-60 committed less than 20% rate of
crime
.
Secondly
, The pie chart shows the
crime
 committed
last
year
 was dominated by violent
crime
 with 46%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the total. The second most committed
crime
 was property
crime
 with 23%
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
followed
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 drug
crime
 with
slightly
Correct article usage
a slightly
show examples
 lower percentage
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 22%. Public order
crime
 remained
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the rarest
crime
 committed in the UK
last
year
 with just 9%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the total.
Submitted by nadhif2799 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words year, crime with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "provide" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • The line graph depicts
  • The pie chart illustrates
  • reveals
  • displays
  • depicts
  • the trend of
  • the overall crime rate
  • steadily decreased
  • the distribution of
  • different types of crime
  • prevalent
  • accounts for
  • the most common crime
  • followed by
  • make up
  • a smaller proportion of
  • the total crimes
  • a smaller percentage
  • approximately
  • the remaining percentage
  • It is important to note that
  • reflects
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