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Writing Samples /
Band 7

You have recently moved to a new place and haven’t got a chance to tell your friend. Write a letter to your friend, Where and why you move from there Compare your new place to old Where do u live now

#place #haven’t #chance #friend #where #move #compare
Dear Kiran, I'd like to apologize for not letting you know that I have moved to a new city as I was so busy that I did not get time to tell you. I moved to New Brunswick
last
 week because I did not get a
job
 in Ontario that suits my qualifications. I got a great opportunity to work as a caregiver
thereafter
 one of my interviews. I found that
this
 position
also
 holds good pay.
This
job
also
 comes under the Atlantic programs which will help in getting permanent residence in the future. New Brunswick is very different from Ontario in aspects of
job
 opportunities where people get jobs very easily
due to
 the low population.
Additionally
, I am enjoying more natural beauty here with lots of trees and gardens. I love
this
 place
due to
 its weather which is mind-blowing. Nowadays I am living in a city named Moncton. My
job
 is just 2
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 away from my home. Most of the time I go to
job
 by walking rather than taking the bus or Uber. I am enjoying every side of
this
 city because
this
 fulfills all the needs that I always wanted. I hope you will visit me soon. Your's friend, Neha
Submitted by neetpunar on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and avoid including information that might seem extraneous to the topic. For example, the specifics of the job program might be considered slightly off-topic if the main focus is the move and the comparison between places.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases effectively to signal the relationship between ideas. While there was a logical flow, more sophisticated linking could enhance the letter's clarity and cohesion.
task achievement
Include a more extensive comparison between the old and the new place. The comparison provided is somewhat brief and lacking in detail.
task achievement
Maintain a consistent formal or informal tone throughout the letter, according to the relationship with the reader. The tone used was suitable, although occasionally it bordered on informal, which may not match the context of discussing job opportunities.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Relocate
  • Transition
  • Adjustment
  • Neighborhood
  • Amenities
  • Atmosphere
  • Homesickness
  • Community
  • Lifestyle
  • Cultural shift
  • Residential area
  • Scenery
  • Urban/Rural
  • Local cuisine
  • Public transport
  • Vibrant
  • Tranquil
  • Inviting
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