In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. What might be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
In
this
day and age, people
in several nations are finding their way to buy a house rather than feeling satisfied with the rental situation because a home
is a great asset in many cultures' mindset that is
worth an investment. To my belief, it is an optimistic case, as from which, a strong sense of savings or money
management is formed.
In relation to the cause of home owning
emergence, Add a hyphen
home-owning
while
rental is seen as a liability, which people
end up not benefiting a single penny from at all, the
ownership comes to light as a more promising future. Especially, with a supportive housing policy developed by some governments, citizens only have to pay upfront a certain percentage of the house's value and Correct article usage
apply
then
pay the rest in monthly instalments that somehow is
like a rental. Yet in the end, these Correct subject-verb agreement
are
people
can own a house of themselves without extra expenses and less worry about the future leasing cost acceleration. For these reasons, people
having the desire to have their lives including finance and accomodation
in order, are Correct your spelling
accommodation
continously
more seen to go for Correct your spelling
continuously
home
ownership.
As someone with an
Correct article usage
a
alike
mindset, I find Correct word choice
similar
this
as
a Change preposition
apply
possitive
Correct your spelling
positive
phenomena
. Fix the agreement mistake
phenomenon
This
trend will help people
build up strong
enough Correct article usage
a strong
money
management mindset from accumulative savings. It is way better than spending money
wildly or without any further
purposes. Consequently
, the dependable belief of citizens will ultimately be taken cared
of by their governments' accommodation policy is Replace the word
care
also
inappropriate and irresponsible. The reason is they are ones
who should care for themselves, plan for their future and where their Correct article usage
the ones
money
goes to as well to be safer than to be relying upon anyone including their authority.
In conclusion, the security of having an asset such
as a home
other than the same amount paid out regularly but as a liability due to
rental
situation, more and more Add an article
the rental
a rental
people
are readily set up for the plan of owning one. In my opinion, this
is a good option since it gives people
a great sense of savings and money
planning ahead of time.Submitted by camcat.viking on
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coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay would benefit from clearer organization. You should use a range of linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments, ensuring smooth transitions between ideas.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, aim to fully address all parts of the prompt. Provide both sides of the argument, even if you agree more with one side. In this case, discussing some potential downsides or considerations regarding homeownership would make for a more balanced essay.
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