Today’s teenagers struggles with many social issues. Some people think that this is because their parents are spending more time at work than at home. Do you agree or disagree?

In
modern
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the modern
show examples
world,
youngster
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youngsters
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social skills are
under developed
Correct your spelling
underdeveloped
show examples
. Which
developing
Wrong verb form
develops
show examples
poor communities and many other issues. I
toallly
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totally
agree with the statement that people
send
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spend
show examples
more
time
on
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at
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work than at home. First of all,
teenage
Correct article usage
the teenage
show examples
is
Verb problem
years are
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very
Add an article
a very
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sensitive and crucial
time
of
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for
show examples
every
kids
Change to a singular noun
kid
show examples
.
In which
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Which
show examples
gudiance
Correct your spelling
guidance
has to play
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a
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major role
to guide
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in guiding
show examples
them about bad or good .As
teenagers
are not
matures
Wrong verb form
mature
show examples
to
take
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make
show examples
better
decisons
Correct your spelling
decisions
, they always look for better support. No one else can provide them
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with
show examples
better
advise
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advice
show examples
,
instead
of their own
parents
. In
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
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of their
parents
, they always search for
second
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a second
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option. where the common search they do
on
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apply
show examples
online and start connecting more to
virtual
Add an article
the virtual
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world
instead
of the real
society
.
In these
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These
show examples
days
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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very common to see in
society
that most
of
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers
lost
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are lost
show examples
in
electronics
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electronic
show examples
gadget
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gadgets
show examples
.
In
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As
show examples
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
, its common behaviour is developing not to talk and share
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
with anybody.
Moreover
,
youngsters
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youngsters'
youngster's
show examples
brains are not
tarined
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trained
to carry that much vast information from online sources. which developed
sicatric
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sciatic
among them.
secondly
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parents
spend most of their
time
at work to make extra income.
where
Correct word choice
and
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they
forgot
Wrong verb form
forget
show examples
that their main asset is
Correct pronoun usage
their childerens
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childerens
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children
children's
. once
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
is passed
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passes
show examples
and
teenagers
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
becomes
Change the verb form
become
show examples
adults, they
did
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do
show examples
not care for their own
parents
. which
creating
Wrong verb form
creates
show examples
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
of disputes in
society
and families.
Thirdly
, In
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
show examples
of
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
gudience
Correct your spelling
guidance
audience
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
teenage
Correct your spelling
teenagers
show examples
developed
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
some criminal behaviours in people. which is very dangerous to the
society
At
last
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree that
parents
spend their most of
time
at work. which
Correct your spelling
leads
leeds
Correct your spelling
leads
to poor
Correct your spelling
development
developmnet
Correct your spelling
development
of social behaviour of
teenagers
Submitted by liftruxinc on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but are not effective in clearly presenting the topic and summarizing the main points of the argument. Ensure that your introduction clearly states your position and that your conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments without adding new information.
coherence cohesion
The points made are somewhat supported, but the supporting sentences are often incomplete or incoherent. Develop each main point with clear explanations, examples, and arguments that logically support your viewpoint.
task achievement
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task achievement
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task achievement
The essay uses minimal and non-specific examples. Incorporating relevant, specific examples is essential for effectively illustrating your arguments and strengthening your essay. Aim to include at least one strong example per main point.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Parental guidance
  • Supervision
  • Neglect
  • Peer pressure
  • Quality time
  • Unhealthy attention-seeking
  • Online safety
  • Support systems
  • Community programs
  • Independent problem-solving
  • Family dynamics
  • Emotional well-being
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