You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree. You should write at least 250 words.
There are many
thing
that Change to a plural noun
things
students
should learn when they are young, skill and academic knowledge. There is an idea that schools should provide and focus only Change preposition
on academic
academic
success, and abandon Change preposition
on academic
skills
, which are cooking, dressing, and woodworking for example
, development because children
should learn them from their family and friends. From my point of view, I do not agree with this
statement, and the reasons will be explained in the following paragraphs.
There are many reason
that schools should provide Change to a plural noun
reasons
skills
practicing for students
. For the first reason
, students
should spend their rest time at their home for
doing what Change preposition
apply
thay
want, which can be Correct your spelling
they
hobby
, reviewing Add an article
a hobby
Correct article usage
an interested
interested
subject, or developing unique Replace the word
interesting
skills
. The problem is that student
may Fix the agreement mistake
students
do
not interested in some necessary Verb problem
apply
skills
, therefore
school
should teach those Fix the agreement mistake
schools
skills
in the schools in
Change preposition
for
purpose
of making sure that all Add an article
the purpose
student
have those Fix the agreement mistake
students
skills
. For example
, some student
may not interested in cooking, Fix the agreement mistake
students
then
they do not cooking
when they are at home. If Change the verb form
cook
school
do not teach them to cook, they will not be able to cook when they are adult.
Another Fix the agreement mistake
schools
reason
is that some families that
do not have resources to support their Correct pronoun usage
apply
children
, which can be money or time. Therefore
, children
may not have opportunity
to learn those Correct article usage
the opportunity
skills
. For example
, woodworking is the
skill that Correct article usage
a
have
to use Verb problem
requires
tools
and a workshop to study, and requires experts Change preposition
of tools
for teaching
and Change preposition
to teach
controlling
safety. Wrong verb form
control
As a result
, there are very few family
that have members who can do woodworking, and have proper tools. Change to a plural noun
families
From
Change preposition
For
this
reason
, school
have to provide Fix the agreement mistake
schools
chance
Add an article
a chance
the chance
to
their Change preposition
for
student
to practice those skills
at school
.
In conclusion, school
should not only focus on academic achievementFix the agreement mistake
schools
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
basic
Change preposition
on basic
skills
that important
for living for many Add a missing verb
are important
reason
. Change to a plural noun
reasons
Firstly
, students
should spend their time freely when they are at home, and learn those skills
at school
. Secondly
, some families cannot train their child
, Fix the agreement mistake
children
therefore
developing the skills
should not rely on children
's families and friends. The government should provide cost
of developing basic Add an article
the cost
a cost
skills
to all school
and train teachers to be able to teach Fix the agreement mistake
schools
thair
Correct your spelling
their
students
.Submitted by bhurin.kua on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic, but there are gaps in the development of your argument. Strengthen your response by consistently expanding on your main points with clear reasoning and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and logical progression of ideas. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, followed by explanations and examples related to the topic. Use cohesive devices effectively to link your ideas together.
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