Some people believe that traveling is a valuable experience; others say it is a waste of time and money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Have you ever thought about travelling in the world in 80 days as Passepartout did in the famous book by Jules Verne? To many people, the idea seems interesting and travelling in general sounds attractive, but it is much more than just visiting interesting
places
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. It requires a lot of arrangements and effort, and in my opinion, it is a waste of
money
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and
time
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.
Firstly
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, travelling is not cheap. It is true that nowadays an average person can afford to
travel
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the world because it is not as expensive as it used to be in the past, but from the moment you set off on a journey, you keep spending
money
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. You must pay for transportation, lodgings, food, tourist attractions and other unexpected things that always happen when you
travel
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. In return for all your effort, you reach your destination and
visit
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a place which you could
also
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visit
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virtually by watching a good documentary on TV.
Moreover
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,
places
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and things that you watch on TV are all free of charge,
whereas
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visiting them in person costs
money
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and
time
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. Travelling is
time
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-consuming.
Instead
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of doing things at home, you spend long hours sitting in your car, on the bus, on the plane,
or
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apply
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waiting at the airports, railway or bus station, or just trying to find your way. Each real journey takes
time
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.
On the other hand
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, any
virtually
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virtual
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journey saves you a lot of
time
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. Without leaving your home, you can find yourself on the other side of the world, visiting a rainforest or a desert, within a few minutes. What is more, you can
also
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see the
places
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which may not be accessible to
tourist
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tourists
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, at all And
last
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but not least, for all the
money
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and
time
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you spend on travelling, for all
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money
Correct article usage
the money
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and
time
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you spend on
travellong
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travel long
, you may get a disappointing experience. The
places
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you go may not be as impressive and unique as you thought. Travelling is stressful and challenging. You often suffer from fatigue, heart, thirst or hunger which usually disturb the feeling
or
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of
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joy, happiness and
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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.
To sum up
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, in my opinion, travelling is much overrated and not worth the trouble. There are many cheaper ways to
visit
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and learn about the
places
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which interest you without spending a penny.
Instead
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of wasting your
time
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on planes and buses, you can attend a slide show,
visit
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a
travel
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blog, or watch a documentary. You can
travel
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virtually and still enjoy it.
Submitted by thuhuyen16992qn on

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introduction conclusion present
The essay lacks a clear and concise introduction that clearly states the topic and previews the main points. Consider adding a thesis statement and a roadmap of the points to be discussed.
complete response
While the essay presents an opinion, it fails to fully address both views as required by the task. Make sure to discuss both sides equally before presenting your own opinion to meet the requirements of the question.
relevant specific examples
The ideas are relevant but not sufficiently developed with clear and specific examples. Integrate more concrete examples and illustrations to strengthen the arguments and make the essay more persuasive.
logical structure
The essay demonstrates some organization, but the structure could be improved. Ideas can be better connected for the reader by using more transition phrases and clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.
supported main points
To improve cohesion, ensure that each paragraph revolves around a single main point. Additionally, utilize a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas within and across paragraphs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • broadens horizons
  • cultural exposure
  • tolerance
  • self-reliance
  • overcoming challenges
  • language proficiency
  • sustainable tourism
  • environmental footprint
  • cultural homogenization
  • commercialization
  • responsible travel
  • global understanding
  • eco-friendly practices
  • accessible alternatives
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