Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changes the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?

The use of advanced gadgets has undoubtedly made industrial
life
Use synonyms
easier. I believe that
this
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development has shown a potential profit;
however
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, every achievement comes with some demerits, which I will
also
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discuss in the upcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
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,
stating
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state
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some of the beneficial outcomes that have been brought by these technologies. Some work fields, like construction, which demand heavy lifting, machines,
for instance
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, cranes, bulldozers, etc, have made human
life
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convenient.
Moreover
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, the loading and unloading of the goods are better with the advanced equipment, saving energy and time.
Furthermore
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,
due to
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the introduction of artificial intelligence, robots have been installed in industries that do all the work with more accuracy,
thus
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increasing work efficiency. Not only
this
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, but
also
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these advancements are making the workplace eco-friendly. To demonstrate
this
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point, Japan has introduced the dark industry, where the word 'dark' refers to no use of lights, as it is fully operated by robots.
Thus
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, making it more environmentally friendly.
However
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, depending too much on technology harms the human race.
Although
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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heavy machinery has made human
life
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easier, it is not easy to operate, and it can easily break, which can cost someone's
life
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. To exemplify, in China, around ten construction workers were killed
due to
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the malfunctioning of the lift in 2023.
Furthermore
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, industrial robots are ending the careers of many workers,
thus
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increasing unemployment. To recapitulate,
although
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technology-driven tools have made human
life
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more convenient, depending too much on them is even worse.
Therefore
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, a careful approach is required to handle
this
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big equipment.
Also
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, the use of advanced tools should be limited so that the human race can survive by means of employment.

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task achievement
Try to provide even more specific examples to support your points, particularly in the second main body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are clearly linked and that each paragraph flows logically to enhance the overall coherence of your essay.
content
Your introduction sets a clear direction for the essay, outlining the main points to be discussed.
content
You provide a relevant example from Japan that enhances the argument regarding the eco-friendliness of modern technology.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • efficiency
  • automation
  • collaboration
  • communication platforms
  • remote work
  • flexibility
  • data management
  • decision-making
  • data analytics
  • consumer behavior
  • training programs
  • teamwork
  • innovation
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