The line graph illustrates the number of visitors in millions from the UK who went abroad and those that came to the UK between 1979 and 1999, while the bar chart shows which countries were the most popular for UK residents to visit in 1999.

#line #visitors #millions #uk #bar #countries #residents #visit

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The given line chart indicates some information about

number

Change the article

a number

the number

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of visitors who

visit

Wrong verb form

visited

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Remove the preposition

apply

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and from the

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between 1979 and 1999. It is clearly evident that the

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residents who travelled abroad was about 11

millions

Change to singular

million

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in 1979 which was higher

that

Correct your spelling

than

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the proportion of overseas residents.

This

Linking Words

number had a considerable increase over the next

twenty-years

Correct your spelling

twenty years

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and reached a peak of over 50

million

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individuals in 1999.

Besides

Linking Words

that, tourists who came to the

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were 10

million

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in 1979, but

this

Linking Words

proportion experienced a slight growth to approximately 28

million

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visitors in 1999.

Further

Linking Words

, the second chart illustrates

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

popular destinations

Change preposition

for

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English people in 1999. It is crystal clear that Franch was by far the most

favorable

Change the spelling

favourable

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place with 11

million

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visitors. After that, with a slight

difference

Add a comma

difference,

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we observe Spain as the second most interested country with about nine

million

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English tourists.

Last

Linking Words

but not least, the USA, Greece, and Turkey are three other countries which were desirable for the

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society with about four, three, and two

million

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million

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spectators, respectively.

Overall

Linking Words

, it is utterly obvious that England's citizens liked to travel overseas more than other

nation's

Fix the agreement mistake

nations'

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population

Fix the agreement mistake

populations

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who desired to visit the

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Additionally

Linking Words

Franch

Correct your spelling

France

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and Spain were the most popular destinations.

Submitted by tg.persian on Mon Dec 25 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, million with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

209 words

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The line graph illustrates the number of visitors in millions from the UK who went abroad and those that came to the UK between 1979 and 1999, while the bar chart shows which countries were the most popular for UK residents to visit in 1999.

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Your friend is thinking about learning to drive and would like some advice. Write a letter to your friend. -Say why a driving license is advantageous. -Recommend a driving school. -Give extra guidance/tips.

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negative development?

Some people think that the best way to reduce the time spent in travelling to work is to replace parks and gardens close to the city center with apartment buildings for commuters, but others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.