Some cultures think old people are of higher value than the youth, while other cultures value the youth more. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In certain cultures,

people

believe that older

people

have more value than younger ones. On the other side, others believe young generations have more value. In my opinion, both have equal values and I will discuss in detail about

this

in the below paragraphs.

To begin

with, old

people

have more experience and knowledge compared to younger ones. I agree that younger ones can learn more things from them which will eventually help to improve their knowledge.

For Instance

, a person with more experience in a company will train and mentor the fresher on the job.

This

will help a new joiner or a young person with less experience to go on the right track and perform his duties well.

Similarly

, we can

also

see that an experienced person's advice will help to tackle the problems that arise in personal life and even during work.

On the other hand

, we can

also

see youngsters are more energetic and passionate about learning new things. We can see that old

people

will have some difficulties when it comes to learning new technologies.

Also

, they cannot compete with the young generation for being fast and active during work or any activities.

This

way we can see even younger generations are equally valued to bring society to a better shape. In conclusion, on the whole, I would suggest both older and younger generations are valued equally

instead

of being one of them valued higher than the other. By doing

this

we can get more benefits to any culture.

Submitted by mailramkrish on Mon Dec 25 2023

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task response

To improve your score for task response, ensure that your essay provides an extended and well-developed discussion on the reasons why some cultures might value older people more, while others prioritize youth. It is essential that you equally balance the discussion between the two perspectives before giving your opinion. Provide in-depth analysis and reasoning for your view.

coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider organizing your paragraphs more effectively so that there is a clear progression of ideas. Use a range of linking words and cohesive devices to help connect your ideas smoothly. Avoid abrupt transitions between ideas and make sure that each paragraph flows logically into the next. Aim for a clear central theme in each paragraph that relates back to the overall thesis of the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some cultures think old people are of higher value than the youth, while other cultures value the youth more. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Research has shown that spending less time in the office can reduce the use of energy (for example, electricity, gas). Thus some companies close for some days a week. Do this advantage of this development outhweight the disadvantage.

Employers should focus on personal qualities instead of qualifications and experience when choosing someone for a job. To what extent do you agree?

many developing countries require eight from international organizations to develop. many people think that this age should be financial, while others think that practical aid and advice are more useful. discuss both views and give your opinion.

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999, and the bar graph shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.