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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
Whilst some
people
 believe it is best to accept a bad
situation
, others might think that improving the
situation
 can be a better option. I believe that overcoming problems by making more effort is a better decision, rather than just accepting reality. Some
people
 might only choose to accept the unfavourable
situation
 when they have run out of options.
For instance
, there are some
workers
 who have been dealing with an unsupportive work environment and have been supervised by a toxic manager, but they need to keep their jobs because they need to pay for their family’s living costs and their monthly children's education tuition. The
workers
 can not be selfish by resigning from their job and trying to find another one,
thus
 they have to accept their circumstances.
On the other hand
, I argue that they have to deal with their
situation
 by improving their conditions in order to get a better condition, even though they need a sacrifice. With the previous example, the
workers
 can find another job, even if they have to be jobless for a moment. With that action, the
workers
 can be less stressed and they can maximize their potential towards their next career,
instead
 of being stuck in their current job. In my opinion, it is better to struggle for a short period of time for a better future, rather than doing something dreadful continuously. In conclusion, I think it is quite reasonable too why some
people
 decide to only face the unpleasant reality because they have to reconsider their current condition.
However
, I personally believe that taking action for an unsatisfying
situation
 might be a better option because
people
 need to do something to get out of their current terrible state.
Submitted by shafatriviaa on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences within the paragraph are relevant to this idea.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to create more complex sentence structures, which can help enhance the logic and flow of the essay.
task achievement
Develop the main points further by providing more detailed examples and explanations. This will make your arguments more persuasive and comprehensive.
task achievement
While your position is clear, make sure to equally discuss both views before stating your opinion. Balance is key in this type of essay.
task achievement
Consider using real-world examples, including statistics or research if applicable, to strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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