Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live?
With the advantages of technology,
the
Correct article usage
apply
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
has
shifted to a Correct subject-verb agreement
have
lifestyle
in which individual requirement
for delicious Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
food
has
emerged not just to fulfill Correct subject-verb agreement
have
the
hunger. They want to enjoy a diverse range of foods with Correct article usage
apply
a
varying Correct article usage
apply
taste
and for that have invented many new and complex recipes. They want to do it easily and swiftly with the help of modern tools and technology. Has Fix the agreement mistake
tastes
this
really improved our lifestyle
or has done more harms
? Let us examine Fix the agreement mistake
harm
this
in the following essay. People
want to enjoy a diverse type of food
— prepare them at home
or eat at expensive restaurants. People
want to try new cuisines both at home
and at restaurants and they want to be served promptly. This
is where the
modern equipment takes partCorrect article usage
apply
in
, and Change preposition
apply
food
preparation nowadays is easier and faster and this
has definitely enhanced our lifestyle
as it allows us to enjoy food
, not just satisfy our tummy. Moreover
, modern tools like the rice cooker, microwave oven, slicer, mixer, electric heater and so on make the cooking process quick and convenient. This
saves a great deal of time unlike
the past when someone had to be busy all day to prepare meals for the family. Add the comma(s)
, unlike
People
now have more time for recreation, hobbies and for the family. For students, busy corporate, businessmen and researchers, this
improvement remarkably enhances their lifestyle
. On the downside, the advancements in food
preparation methods have led to the growth of fast food
industries and their restaurants pop-up
everywhere, like mushrooms after the rain. Correct your spelling
pop up
This
might seem convenient for those who do not have time to prepare food
at home
, but the health hazards are even greater. The obesity rate is skyrocketing in western
countries and more Capitalize word
Western
people
, these days, are suffering from health-related issues. In conclusion, the latest technology has undeniably improved the quality of individual’s
living Change noun form
individual
standard
but not without a cost. To make the best of Fix the agreement mistake
standards
this
development we have to avoid junk food
but prepare more nutritious food
at home
.Submitted by pamela.herrera1000 on
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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure of your essay, consider organizing your points more clearly. Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the paragraphs follow one another in a logical sequence that builds up your argument.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are present, work on making sure they not only bookend your essay but also reflect a strong, clear thesis that is thoroughly examined through the body paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported, but to further strengthen your essay, continually link back to the central thesis, showing how each point directly supports your overall argument.
task achievement
Ensure that your response is complete by fully addressing all parts of the task. It could be improved by expanding on how food preparation technology impacts daily life beyond the scope of health and time savings.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive most times, but avoid generalizations and strive to continue developing ideas in a way that shows a deeper consideration of the topic.
task achievement
Incorporate more relevant and specific examples to solidify your argument. These can serve as evidence for the points you make and will help the reader see the practical implications of your ideas.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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