Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an aparment?

In the modern era,
people
are busy in their lives. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
prefer houses
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
apartments to
living
Change the verb form
live
show examples
a wonderful lifestyle. Both of them have advantages and disadvantages.
Firstly
,
people
living in a
house
have a lot of space to
accomdate
Correct your spelling
accommodate
and it will
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
to
enchance
Correct your spelling
enhance
the relationship between the family members. Family members can enjoy functions like
birthday
Fix the agreement mistake
birthdays
show examples
,
Correct word choice
and anniversary
show examples
anniversary
Fix the agreement mistake
anniversaries
show examples
.
Moreover
,
people
can
built
Change the verb form
build
be built
show examples
their
Correct word choice
own house
show examples
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
depends
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
upon
Change preposition
on
show examples
their own wishes. They can
modified
Change the verb form
modify
show examples
the outer area for the children.
Therefore
, kids can enjoy their own freedom.
However
, the
manitence
Correct your spelling
maintenance
of the
house
is a big issue for the
people
who are living in houses.
Secondly
,
people
who are living in flats they can
impreve
Correct your spelling
improve
their
life stle
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
. They can access the facilities like gym,
Correct word choice
and
show examples
swimmming
Correct your spelling
swimming
pool.
in addition
, the
maintenace
Correct your spelling
maintenance
charege
Correct your spelling
charge
is low.
However
,
people
who live in apartments have no family space. It will affect the development of the family
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
the child. In
conculsion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, both
apartment
Fix the agreement mistake
apartments
show examples
and flats have
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
and
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
.
People
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
show examples
in
house
Add an article
the house
a house
show examples
can enjoy more
happy
Correct word choice
happier
show examples
life than the
Correct your spelling
people
peole
Correct your spelling
people
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
apartment
apartments
apaertment
Correct article usage
an apaertment
show examples
Submitted by mariyamathew08 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that you address all parts of the task adequately. In your essay, you did not adequately compare the advantages and disadvantages of living in a house and an apartment, nor did you clearly state if one has more advantages than the other, as the question prompt requests.
coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your essay in a way that makes the progression of ideas clear and logical. Use linking words effectively to connect ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
Include more developed examples to support your arguments. Specific details and examples enhance the clarity of your points.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion should summarise the main points made in the essay and clearly state your final position on the issue.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • residential preferences
  • property ownership
  • private dwelling
  • shared facilities
  • urban vs suburban living
  • customization
  • sustainability
  • appreciation of property value
  • real estate market
  • housing tenure
What to do next:
Look at other essays: