Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that using mobile
phones
should be allowed during study time for children .
However
,
this
essay strongly stands with the people who believe that working with these devices in
school
should be banned. It is understandable that using the phone in the
class
can bring more detail about the lessons.In fact,
while
the teacher is explaining a subject in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
class
,
students
can browse the internet and find more details about the topic and understand the teacher's point better.
For instance
, when the topic of studying is about human body parts, it is hard to imagine all parts of the human body following the teacher's
word
Fix the agreement mistake
words
show examples
.
However
, smart smartphones have the ability to search on the internet and display the human body during the study and they may help to learn better.
Although
the device can help in
this
way,teachers can bring a projector with them in
class
and show images to
students
instead
of using mobile
phones
. On the opposite side,
students
can be more focused on their studies, if using
phones
is banned in
school
.In fact, children and youngsters prefer to work with applications and play games on their
phones
instead
of listening to their courses.
therefore
,
this
device can distract them and they may not learn the subject of the
class
.
For example
, there was
an
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apply
show examples
experiment literature in an Indian
school
which illustrated that a
class
without using a phone had a better average mark compared to the other
class
using
this
device. In conclusion,
Although
using
phones
by
students
can help them learn their lessons,it has lots of drawbacks
such
as distraction during the
school
day.
therefore
Capitalize word
Therefore
show examples
; the best choice in my point of view is to make a rule and ban
phones
.
Submitted by mohammad.bameri.1380 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a clear logical progression in your writing. Each paragraph should follow the previous one in a way that is easy for your reader to understand. Use more cohesive devices to create a smoother flow between sentences and ideas.
Task Response
Expand your discussion in a balanced manner. Address both views of the argument comprehensively, providing specific and relevant examples to support each. Include a more nuanced personal opinion to fully satisfy the task requirement.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Distraction
  • Cyberbullying
  • Concentration
  • Emergency communication
  • Digital literacy
  • Educational resources
  • Social development
  • Self-regulation
  • Enforcement
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Technology access
  • Learning apps
  • Screen time
  • Peer interaction
  • School policy
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