The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now.

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now.
The given maps depict the layout of a central library with 20
years
Correct your spelling
20-year
gap. From an
overall
perspective, it is readily apparent that the old layout
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
the library
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
crowded
while
the recent map
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a quite empty spaces
Correct the article-noun agreement
quite empty spaces
a quite empty space
show examples
. Looking more closely at the maps, the most visible thing that will
be change
Change the verb form
be changed
show examples
when people walk in is the table arrangements. It will
be rearrange
Change the verb form
be rearranged
show examples
into a cafe
that is
located on the first right
side
door when people
walked
Wrong verb form
walk
show examples
into the entrance.
Moreover
, the entertainment
room
that
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
filled with CDs, videos and computer games will
be change
Change the verb form
be changed
show examples
into children's fiction books, storytelling events,
as well as
the sitting area. Moving on to the upper right
side
, the lecture
room
will placed there,
subsequently
, the adult fiction books
as well as
the information desk will placed in front of the
room
.
According to
the data, the computer
room
will be moved
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
the lower left
side
of the building.
Then
lastly
all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of general books are going to be put in the left
side
hall. To draw the conclusion, the layout of the central library will have a significant change
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to the 20 years ago plan.
Submitted by almirarhaseshaa on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as".
Vocabulary: Replace the words side, room with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 3 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • floor plan
  • layout
  • shelving
  • reading area
  • reference section
  • encyclopedias
  • dictionaries
  • circulation desk
  • transactions
  • digital media
  • computer stations
  • multimedia rooms
  • café area
  • social environment
  • leisure-friendly
  • expanded reading areas
  • user experience
  • comfortable seating
  • children's section
  • engage younger readers
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