In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

It is a fact that in some regions, buying a home is more essential rather than renting a home. In
this
essay, I will discuss some possible reasons for
this
and argue that
this
is largely a positive development. There are some reasons why
owing
Correct your spelling
owning
show examples
house
Add an article
a house
show examples
is more important than renting one for some
people
.
Firstly
,
people
are worried about their present and future and they think
this
might be a valuable investment for them.
For example
, in Iran,
due to
inflation,
house
prices are increasing every day and
people
's investing will
multiple
Change the word
multiply
show examples
.
Also
, their next generation inherits the
house
and it is a good financial support for them.
Secondly
, some
people
like to settle down in one place and stay there for life. So, they do not have to worry about some issues
such
as problems of moving and increasing of rent
house
every year.
This
is largely a positive situation. They can do whatever they like in
houses
Correct pronoun usage
their houses
show examples
. They can paint, design,
Correct word choice
and rebuilt
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rebuilt
Wrong verb form
rebuild
show examples
their home.
Therefore
, they have full discretion.
Also
, the inspiration to strive harder and improve their earning.
Thus
, individual growth leads to the development of the society. In conclusion, there are many means to buying
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
nowadays
such
as investing for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
, getting rid of moving yearly and paying monthly, and
this
is positive in some aspects
such
as having freedom and making
effort
Correct article usage
an effort
show examples
to save money.
Submitted by kk.1379 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay shows a basic level of coherence and cohesion. To improve, aim to have a clearer logical flow between ideas by using a range of discourse markers that accurately reflect the relationships between ideas. Avoid jumping from point to point without clear transitions.
task achievement
As for task achievement, your response addresses the prompt, but it needs to provide more depth in the ideas presented. Consider developing each main point by offering more detailed explanations, and include more specific examples which are fully extended and directly related to the task.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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