today the high sales of Polular consumer goods reflect the power of advertisng and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold to what extent do you agree or disagree ?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Currently, the increasing sales of famous consumer
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

product
Fix the agreement mistake
products

It seems that product may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
led to how advertising strongly
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences

It seems that the verb influence does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
people's
spend
Wrong verb form
spending

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb spend. Consider changing it.

show examples
money not the authentic needs to be society. In my experience, I think the topic provides both agree and disagree
idea
Fix the agreement mistake
ideas

It seems that idea may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
for four reasons. My content
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject My content. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples
divided into four
paragraps
Correct your spelling
paragraphs

If you don’t want paragraps to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

including introduction, agree, disagree, and conclusion parts. I partly agree at the same time I disagree because
firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I agree that many bands are not popular so they require
to
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
more
advertisement
Replace the word
advertising

The word advertisement doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,some local
brand
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is that many
human
Change to a plural noun
humans

The singular countable noun human follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

show examples
do not know what
brand
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

nor
use
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to it.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some goods need to
use
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

famous
Add an article
a famous
the famous

The noun phrase famous person seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
person to
sale
Replace the word
sell

The word sale doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, drinking local
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

brand
Fix the agreement mistake
brands

It seems that brand may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
require to promote when they want to get high cost.
Thirdly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, nowadays,
shoping
Correct your spelling
shopping

If you don’t want shoping to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

online is not popular so they want to promote
on
Correct pronoun usage
it on

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
social media
likes
Wrong verb form
like

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb likes. Consider changing it.

show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
television,
instragram
Correct your spelling
Instagram

If you don’t want instragram to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

,
Correct word choice
and facebook
show examples
facebook
Capitalize word
Facebook

The word facebook should be capitalized in this context.

show examples
.
Lastly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
season
Replace the word
seasonal

The word season doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
goods need to
use
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

advertising because it
short
Add a missing verb
is short

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
term to
sale
Replace the word
sell

The word sale doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
. I disagree that
frist
Correct your spelling
first

If you don’t want frist to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

at
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
all, some products can
sale
Replace the word
sell

The word sale doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
by
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Apple which many people know
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
.
Saecondly
Correct your spelling
Secondly

If you don’t want Saecondly to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, many products have several comments because customers care about
review
Fix the agreement mistake
reviews

It seems that review may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
more than advertising.
Thirdly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

product
Fix the agreement mistake
products

It seems that product may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
have a high quality
for instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

good material , processing,
high
Correct word choice
and high

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
value. they can refer their friend and recommend
to
Change the verb form
using

To use doesn’t seem to work here.

show examples
use
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

it.
Last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

but
noht
Correct your spelling
not

If you don’t want noht to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

least,
Correct article usage
a luxury
show examples
luxury
Correct article usage
a luxury

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
Use synonyms
Fix the agreement mistake
brands
show examples
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

brand
Fix the agreement mistake
brands

It seems that brand may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
everyone know it
good
Add a missing verb
is good

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
and
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality

It appears that high quality is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

show examples
everyone
Correct subject-verb agreement
believes
show examples
believe
Correct subject-verb agreement
believes

It seems that the verb believe does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
. In conclusion,
advertisment
Correct your spelling
advertisement
advertising

If you don’t want advertisment to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

is important to promote
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

product
Fix the agreement mistake
products

It seems that product may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
that
not
Add a missing verb
are not

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
well-known including shopping online,
season
Replace the word
seasonal

The word season doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

product
Fix the agreement mistake
products

It seems that product may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
, famous people, and some
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

product
Fix the agreement mistake
products

It seems that product may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
not too popular. They
use
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

advertising to dramatically
inceasing
Correct your spelling
increasing

If you don’t want inceasing to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices

It seems that price may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
and hing grad value.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure the response is well-organized with a clear introduction, coherent body paragraphs, and an appropriate conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea.
coherence cohesion
Focus on the logical progression of ideas. Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing effectively to present a well-structured argument.
coherence cohesion
Fully develop your main points. Support each point with specific details or examples to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task. Make sure to answer the question directly and to discuss both sides of the argument if required.
task achievement
Present clear and comprehensive ideas. Avoid overly complex sentences where clarity is lost, and ensure relevance to the topic throughout.
task achievement
Provide relevant and specific examples to support your views. These examples should be well-integrated into your argument and contribute to its development.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: