Some modern artist receive huge sums of money for the things they create while others struggle to survive Governments should take steps to resolve this unfair situation To what extent do you agree or disagree
Art
is given a huge press. One of the most sognificant
issues for the contemporary era is about Correct your spelling
significant
art
and artist
. On Fix the agreement mistake
artists
one
hand, we can obviously see a few individuals who are severely successful in their Correct article usage
the one
caree
. Correct your spelling
careers
On the other hand
, myriad artists
are living in deprive
and striving to stay alive. I almost agree that it is Replace the word
deprivation
government's
duty to solve Correct article usage
the government's
this
problem.
Initially
, it is clearly evident that every person needs a place for working
. So Change preposition
to work
artists
are for exception, and government
should make a place for these Correct article usage
the government
crowd
to display their works Fix the agreement mistake
crowds
toward
ordinary people who might like to see or Change preposition
to
buy
. It is obvious that Correct pronoun usage
buy them
art
in the mofern
era is like a piece of cake and society Correct your spelling
modern
look
at it Correct subject-verb agreement
looks
toward
Change preposition
from
materialistic
perspective. Correct article usage
a materialistic
Additionally
, allegedly, no one seek
Change the verb form
seeks
for
Change preposition
apply
art
for art
's perse
, but Correct your spelling
purpose
on the contrary
, art
is sought for its luxurious view. It might be admired by some rich indivisuals
who desire to show themselves off. For Correct your spelling
individuals
an
instance, these days there are myriad Correct article usage
apply
art
galleries all around the world and all of them are allocated to high-class families. As a result
, regime
can enhance the situation Add an article
the regime
with
creating some Change preposition
by
speciall
places for Correct your spelling
special
artists
.
Apart from the place, allocating budget
for supporting these industries Correct article usage
a budget
part
of society might be beneficial, too. Change preposition
as part
For example
, by donating a monthly pension or even some helpful insurance. We know that living in this
world could be very expensive, especially when you do not have any advocate. Hense
, donating money from the public could be beneficial, too.
On the flip side, maybe it might be unfair to just look at superior positions. Society as an important part of each nation could help Correct your spelling
Hence
artists
for
increasing Change preposition
by
the
public awareness about Correct article usage
apply
the
culture and Correct article usage
apply
art
. As an example, whenever we listen to a music
, try to pay for it online Remove the article
music
a piece of music
instead
of just listening.
Overall
, it is crystal clear that however
the government has a pivotal role in the situation of artists
, we should try to do our bit. It it
not only helpful for Correct your spelling
is
artists
, but also
beneficial for our culture and community.Submitted by tg.persian on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure there is a clear and logical structure to your essay. While there is an attempt to organize ideas, there is a need for clearer paragraphing and more distinct progression of ideas. Each paragraph should contain one main idea with supporting sentences that flesh it out.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more clearly. The essay occasionally lacks cohesive devices or they are sometimes used inaccurately. Practice more on the use of connectors to improve the flow of your essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic, but does not fully develop a response that is as comprehensive as it could be. Make sure to answer all parts of the prompt fully. While you have included examples, they could be developed further to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are somewhat clear, but the development of these ideas is not always comprehensive or detailed. Provide a more detailed explanation of how and why certain solutions might work. More in-depth analysis will contribute to a higher score in this area.
task achievement
Specific examples are good, but they need to be clearly relevant and developed further. Make sure the examples provided directly support the point you are making in the paragraph and elaborate on how they are relevant to the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.