In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of the world, a
group
of
people
trust that
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
number of
people
earning extraordinarily large
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
of
revenues
Fix the agreement mistake
revenue
show examples
benefit the
country
while
others
against
Add a missing verb
are against
show examples
it. Another
group
of
people
who disagreed
believe
Wrong verb form
believed
show examples
that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
should control the salaries into a limited ceiling.
This
essay will explain the ideas of both
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
show examples
of the
coins
Fix the agreement mistake
coin
show examples
and
also
express my own opinion. When
people
in the
country
earn extremely high incomes, it can be a good point for the
country
.
Since those
Change preposition
Those
show examples
small
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
of
people
can be the main key to
run
Wrong verb form
running
show examples
successful businesses which
building
Wrong verb form
builds
show examples
up the GDP of the
country
’s
economics
Replace the word
economy
show examples
. One of the positive points resulting from good economics in a
country
is bringing trust from foreign investors.
Consequently
, there will be more money from outside of the
country
to run
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many business activities.
Thus
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
in the
country
can benefit from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
better economic
circumstance
Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
show examples
as well. We cannot deny that receiving giant revenues
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
paramount.
Nevertheless
, it can be a big problem for the
country
. If there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
a big gap
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
revenues for residents in the
country
, the population
is tended
Wrong verb form
tends
show examples
to
divide
Wrong verb form
be divided
show examples
into two groups which are rich
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
and
grassroot
Correct your spelling
grassroots
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. As a sequent, it leads to inequality in the social. From the statistics, the
grassroot
Correct your spelling
grassroots
group
of
people
has
large
Correct article usage
a large
show examples
exceeding amount. Most of them cannot reach some common requisites of living as same as the wealthy ones.
For instance
, poor
people
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural areas
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
not enough health care services or cannot
effort for
Verb problem
afford
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthy foods. In the long run, these problems might lead to bigger
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
such
as human
right
Fix the agreement mistake
rights
show examples
or political issues.
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
my point of view, every story has two
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
show examples
which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
good or bad. It depends on which side we are looking at. I think the middle level of everything is always the best even though it is so difficult to manage to stay at that level sustainably in the real-life situation.
However
, if we can really manage it, it will be an ideal method to balance all of
residents’
Add an article
the residents’
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
in the
country
.
Submitted by sasi.jariyasirikul on

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task achievement
Ensure you address both views of the argument clearly and spend an equal amount of the essay discussing each perspective before giving your own opinion.
task achievement
Work on the development of arguments by including more specific examples and data to support your points, which will strengthen your response.
coherence cohesion
Focus on paragraph structure, ensuring that each main idea is in a new paragraph and is expanded upon adequately.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices and transition words effectively to improve the flow of ideas within and between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Remember to write an introduction that clearly outlines the essay question and your standpoint, as well as a conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • incentivize
  • discrepancy
  • inequality
  • social cohesion
  • equitable distribution
  • wealth concentration
  • talent retention
  • global competitiveness
  • social unrest
  • innovate
  • government intervention
  • salary cap
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