Some people say that the government should spend money on measures to save languages that are used by few speakers, while others believe that it is a waste of financial resources. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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An argument has
arose
Change the verb form
arisen
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between two opinions, the first one says that governments have to spend
money
to protect the rare
languages
,
while
the adverse view believes that
this
will be
money
-consuming.
This
report presents both views and
then
will conclude the writer's point of view.
To begin
with, language is important, inveterate, and useful; as a sequence, it is necessary to protect the different
languages
. The first point, it is the main part of any culture;
as a consequence
, it is essential to maintain it. Many reports illustrated that a variety of nations will be
forgetten
Correct your spelling
forgotten
unless people use their
languages
, so we should do our best to save the remnants to commemorate the antique nations.
Additionally
, they can invest in these
languages
.
For example
, many
countries
offer classes to learn different
languages
, but fees are required.
Besides
that, connecting with native speakers will help to open museums, galleries, and other traditional fairs.
However
, these methods will be profitable and helpful for the whole country
as well as
the native speakers.
Although
the points mentioned above are influencing, there are reverse points that hold equal influence.
Firstly
, governments should invest in searching and learning
instead
of that. For
further
explanation, many developed
countries
such
as Japan, Qatar, and UAE do not pay
money
to save
renmants
Correct your spelling
remnants
and useless
languages
, but they use their financial resources to improve knowledge and technology;
as a result
, these
countries
are extremely rich, comfortable, and satisfied.
Secondly
, improving the population's status should be the government's primary concern. To explain that, there are a lot of developed, rich, and big
countries
, but their population is not relaxed, restful, and wealthy.
This
is because of spending
money
on useless fields;
therefore
, they should start considering their citizens and how to improve their financial statuses. In conclusion, even though
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
languages
are important, necessary, and needful, spending
money
in other fields is more profitable, strategic, and beneficial. Depending on the points mentioned above, I completely believe that it is a waste of financial resources.
Submitted by haneenalnetaif on

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Task Achievement
Make sure your essay directly responds to the question throughout, maintaining focus on the prompt's key aspects.
Task Achievement
While your examples are relevant, incorporating a wider range of detailed examples could further strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay shows good organization and flow of ideas. To enhance it, try varying your sentence structures and using transition phrases for smoother connections between sections.
Coherence & Cohesion
To further improve coherence, ensure each paragraph clearly focuses on a single main idea, supported by examples or explanations.
Coherence & Cohesion
Successfully introduced and concluded the essay, clearly presenting your opinion.
Coherence & Cohesion
Effectively used paragraphs to organise different points of view.
Task Achievement
Capably integrated the discussion of contrasting views into a coherent argument.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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