In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before, some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, global life expectancy has increased, primarily
due to
advancements in medical facilities and improved lifestyles. While
the ageing population
presents challenges for governments, it also
brings valuable contributions to local communities. This
essay will explore both aspects, acknowledging the benefits of the elderly's presence while
emphasizing the essential need for government
assistance in managing their healthcare.
Firstly
, elderly individuals contribute to social balance within families. For instance
, working parents often grapple with the decision to leave their children in childcare centers
, leading to concerns about the well-being of their offspring. Change the spelling
centres
However
, the presence of grandparents offers a solution, providing valuable support and care for grandchildren. Moreover
, many older individuals actively engage in volunteer work, such
as managing traffic during school hours, thereby contributing significantly to the well-being of local communities.
On the flip side, the government
plays a crucial role in mitigating the financial burden on families and ensuring advanced medical facilities for the elderly. Japan serves as an exemplary case, boasting the world's highest life expectancy, with both genders averaging an impressive 85 years, according to
recent World Health Organization data. This
success is attributed to Japan's commitment to evolving medical technology and adherence to comprehensive food guidelines tailored for
the ageing Change preposition
to
population
. It is imperative for other nations to learn from such
examples and invest in both medical advancements and nutritional standards.
Importantly, individuals entering their retirement years have consistently contributed to government
revenue through taxes. Consequently
, it becomes a fundamental human right for them to expect support and care from the government
during this
phase of life. Governments should view this
responsibility as an investment in the well-being of their citizens, rather than a burden on the nation.
In conclusion, the ageing population
brings numerous benefits to families and communities, ranging from valuable time spent with grandchildren to active participation in volunteer activities. However
, governments must recognize their responsibility to provide essential facilities, especially in healthcare, to support the elderly. This
balanced approach ensures that the ageing population
becomes an asset rather than a liability for nations, fostering a harmonious and supportive society.Submitted by patel.bhavesh870 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
While your essay presents a coherent discussion of the issue, to improve, ensure that ideas flow logically from one paragraph to another with clear cohesive devices, maintain relevance to the main topic throughout the essay, and the introduction and conclusion should explicitly address the prompt in a more substantial manner.
task achievement
To fully address the task, expand on the key points in the prompt and provide a balanced argument throughout the essay. The response should directly answer the question with pertinent examples, and explore the advantages and disadvantages of an ageing population more evenly. Reflect on both sides of the argument when forming your assessment of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!