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Writing Samples
Band 6

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart illustrates the generation and
consumption
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 of
electricity
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 during 2014 in some developed
countries
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 and developing ones.
Overall
Linking Words
, most
countries
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 in the chart produced more
electricity
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 than the
consumption
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 of it but Germany. China and the US depicted significantly larger amounts in both production(5398
billion
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kWh
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 and 4099
billion
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kWh
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) and
consumption
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(5322
billion
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kWh
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 and 3866
billion
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kWh
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) of
electricity
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 than those in any other
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countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
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.
However
Linking Words
, Russia, Japan and India generated 1057, 936.2 and 871
billion
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kWh
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 of
electricity
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 separately
while
Linking Words
 they used 1038, 856.7 and 698.8
billion
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kWh
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 of it in 2014. In comparison, the figures for production and
consumption
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 in Canada, France and Korea, Rep. all less than 620
billion
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kWh
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 in the same year. Dramatically, the number of production(526.6
billion
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kWh
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) of
electricity
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 in Germany was slightly lower than
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consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
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 of it(582.5
billion
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kWh
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)
while
Linking Words
 the other
countries
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 showed the opposite conditions.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, electricity, countries, billion, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • disparity
  • significant
  • top ten countries
  • main features
  • compare
  • relevant
  • geographical concentration
  • trends
  • patterns
  • implications
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