The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accomodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011

#percentage #households #accomodation #england #wales

The bar graph gives information about

percentage

Add an article

the percentage

show examples

of families in England and Wales that

own

Wrong verb form

owned

show examples

rent

Wrong verb form

rented

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housing between 1918 and 2011 Generally, the

percentage

of owned housing experienced a significant rise throughout the intervals. Meanwhile, the

percentage

of rented housing faced a sharp fall within the range. The

percentage

of owned housing started with

highest

Change the article

the highest

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number which was at approximately 78%.

However

, the figure began to decline up to 68% in 1939 and remained constant until 1953. After that, the

percentage

gradually decreased until it reached its lowest point of approximately 31% in 2001.

Nevertheless

, the

percentage

of owned housing experienced a

slightly

Change the adverb

slight

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increase in 2011.

On the other hand

, the

percentage

of rented housing began with 23% which was

Change the article

the

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smallest number compared to the other.

Subsequently

, the figure started to grow up to 33% and remained stable in 1953.

Furthermore

, the

percentage

gradually rose up to 50% in 1971. At

this

point, the

percentage

of rented housing is the same as the

percentage

of owned housing. After that, the figure kept increasing until it met its highest point of 79% in 2001.

However

at the end

of the

periods

Fix the agreement mistake

period

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, the

percentage

faced a decrease

until

Change preposition

show examples

64%.

Submitted by writingielts0 on Thu Dec 28 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 11 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

199 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

percentage
households
owned accommodation
rented accommodation
England
Wales
chart
between
trends
increase
decrease
fluctuate
rise
fall
peak
significant
gradual
sharp
steady
dramatic
overall
range from
at the beginning of
at the end of
over the period

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The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accomodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

With a growing population, many people believe that we should focus on producing more GM food. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing this?