Some believe travel is overrated. People argue whether travel is or is not a component of a quality education. To what extent do you agree with it?

#believe #travel #people #component #quality #education

I strongly agree with the opinion that travel is a part of valuable education. First of all, To make

Correct article usage

a shcedule

show examples

shcedule

Correct your spelling

schedule

of travel is creating your own itinerary is a great learning experience. You will have to think about things that

they

Correct pronoun usage

you

show examples

would not normally think about during student

life

such

as how to save money and how to use your time, and

this

will be extremely useful once you enter the workforce.

Secondly

, traveling and experiencing different cultures can be very meaningful to

they

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

life

. You may have new dreams and goals, or your current dreams may become more concrete. Of course, I don't think that

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

is the most important thing in

life

However

, I believe that

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

can definitely enrich your

life

Submitted by akanematsunaga1030 on Fri Dec 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that your essay has a logical structure by providing a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each of these parts should be easily distinguishable and should serve their specific purposes. Your essay lacked a clear conclusion which is crucial to summarize your views and reinforce your argument.

coherence cohesion

Develop your main points further by providing more concrete examples, details, or explanations. While you provided a general overview, more depth is needed to effectively convey your argument. Specific examples add weight to your answer and illustrate your points more convincingly.

task achievement

Try to provide a complete response to the essay question. While you have stated agreement with the idea that travel can be a valuable part of education, the extent of your agreement (which is crucial in this type of essay) is not fully articulated. Provide a more nuanced argument that covers a range of perspectives.

task achievement

Clarify and develop your ideas to improve comprehension. Your essay should present clear and widespread thoughts on the topic, ensuring the reader understands your position and reasoning. You also need to avoid vague statements and overly generalized arguments, aiming instead for clear and precise expression of your ideas.

task achievement

Include relevant and specific examples to support your ideas. Examples serve as evidence and make your argument more persuasive by showing how your ideas apply in a real-world context. You touched on this briefly, but more detailed and specific instances would greatly strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

124 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

expands horizons
diverse cultures
open-mindedness
cultural appreciation
hands-on learning
historical locations
natural wonders
geography
independence
problem-solving
financial constraints
physical disabilities
contingent upon
virtual travel
immersive learning experiences
experiential learning
traditional classroom education
structured knowledge
theoretical foundations
environmental impact
air travel

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Some believe travel is overrated. People argue whether travel is or is not a component of a quality education. To what extent do you agree with it?

Fully explain your ideas

People should only but food sourced locally. What are advantages and disadvantages of this?

In most of the socities,the role of mother and father differs.what are the causes of this differences? What will be the parental role in future?

Nowadays, children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some think that these activities are not beneficial for a child’s mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Othe people think that in today's world subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both points and give your opinion

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?