Many people believe thet media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this oppoinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I agree with the opinion that
celebrities
Change the noun form
celebrity
show examples
gossip is having
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
effect on children. First of all, a lot of celebrity gossip is very tawdry. Much of the
news
Use synonyms
coverage is full of words that we don't want children to see or hear,
such
Linking Words
as sexual harassment and sex scandals.
In addition
Linking Words
, there is a high possibility that there is a lot of
news
Use synonyms
about suicides, etc., and if you only watch
such
Linking Words
news
Use synonyms
at a sensitive time, it will affect you and cause you to become mentally ill. I still remember the
news
Use synonyms
of a Korean high school student who followed the
news
Use synonyms
of his
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
idol's suicide. Based on the negative points mentioned above, I believe that excessive coverage of celebrities has an impact on children.
Submitted by akanematsunaga1030 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
As an IELTS examiner, I would advise you to develop your ideas more fully, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your ideas are logically ordered.
task achievement
Remember to fully address all parts of the task. Your essay should not only agree or disagree with the statement, but also extend this response to cover 'to what extent' do you hold that opinion. Provide more detailed explanations and a wider range of examples to enrich your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overemphasis
  • Materialism
  • Skewed understanding
  • Unrealistic expectations
  • Self-esteem
  • Normalizing
  • Privacy Invasion
  • Invasion of privacy
  • Educational content
  • Distraction
  • Informative media
  • Promotion
  • Instant gratification
  • Glamorous
  • Consumption
  • Idolize
  • Superficial
  • Real-life heroes
  • Critical thinking
  • Engagement
  • Social issues
  • Negative behaviors
  • Awareness
  • Personal boundaries
  • Respect
  • Role models
  • Contribute
What to do next:
Look at other essays: