Some people think the government should pay for healthcare and education, but other people claim that it is the individual’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There have been some discussions revolving around healthcare and
education
.
While
some
people
argue that it is the
government
’s
responsibility
to cover the cost of medical care and
education
, others opine that it is not. I would argue that it is reasonable for governments to fully fund these essential services for the betterment of the nation. On the one hand, some
people
opine that it is the
government
’s
responsibility
to provide decent healthcare and
education
to their
people
. It is because
people
pay different taxes and fees to the
government
,
therefore
, these funds should be used for the
people
's well-being. They suggest that a part of the budget should be set aside for medical and educational purposes. The idea is that having well-educated and healthy citizens benefits the
government
by providing skilled and productive workers, which, in turn, contributes to the country's economic growth.
On the other hand
, those who argue that the
government
should not pay for these services may believe that it is the individual’s
responsibility
to manage their health and learning. They find it unjust, pointing out that some
people
may work hard and contribute a significant amount in taxes,
while
others who are lazy or unemployed may still receive the same benefits from the
government
.
Consequently
, they advocate for separate institutions for healthcare and
education
, where individuals are expected to cover the costs of obtaining a good
education
and maintaining their health. In conclusion,
although
some arguments arise when the governments should not bear the
responsibility
to cover their citizens’ well-being and learning, it seems to me that the
government
should be held accountable for building a healthy and smart nation.
Submitted by hilmi.santiago.alif on

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task achievement
You should aim to present a balanced discussion of both views while extending each main point with clear and relevant examples or reasons. Your essay lacked specific examples to support the ideas you presented.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing clear topic sentences for each paragraph and using a wider range of linking words to connect ideas more coherently. Additionally, strive to present a more nuanced argument and a well-rounded conclusion that reflects on both perspectives before providing your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Universal healthcare
  • Subsidized education
  • Social disparity
  • Public sector
  • Private sector
  • Economic burden
  • Progressive taxation
  • Safety net
  • Accessible healthcare
  • Merit-based scholarships
  • Privatization
  • Social welfare
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