IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

The plans below show how the ground floor of a particular building has changed over time.

#plans #show #ground #floor #time
These plans illustrate different usage of
ground
Add an article
the ground
show examples
 floor in a particular construction from 1958 to now.
Overall
, the data reveals it had three functions over the period,
office
, apartment and
flowershop
Correct your spelling
flower shop
.
Although
 their functions were different, the kitchen
has maintained
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
 unchanged throughout the time. The
office
had been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 in the building
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1958 to 1984. The functions of
chambers
Correct article usage
the chambers
show examples
 suit the demand of workers,
such
 as
office
Add an article
the office
show examples
 of
manager
Correct article usage
the manager
show examples
, assistant and secretary,
in addition
,
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 reception area and meeting room for the
costumers
Correct your spelling
customers
show examples
. From 1985 to 2000, it was an apartment for residents. There were two bedrooms,
living
Correct article usage
a living
show examples
 room,
bathroom
Correct article usage
a bathroom
show examples
 with
shower
Correct article usage
a shower
show examples
 and
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 kitchen which was built in the time of
office
Correct article usage
the office
show examples
. The flower shop started
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2001, the open space was larger than the other two periods and it was used for placing flowers.
Rest
Correct article usage
The rest
show examples
 of the areas were
office
Correct article usage
an office
show examples
,
play
Correct article usage
a play
show examples
 area for kids,
place
Add an article
a place
the place
show examples
 for writing gift cards and
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 unchanged kitchen.
Submitted by chaoweikevin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
For Task Achievement, candidates must respond completely to all parts of the task. The response appears to cover salient features but may lack a full interpretation of the plans. To improve, expand on the details and ensure that comparisons are made when required by the question.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion are assessed by clarity of writing and paragraphing. This report has room for improvement in terms of logical sequencing and using a range of cohesive devices. Be sure to organize information logically, using paragraphs effectively and make clear connections between ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: