Some working parents think that childcare centres provide the best care for children who are still too young to go to school. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays lots of
parents
Use synonyms
doin
Correct your spelling
doin'
doing
jobs and working
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
life. So
soem
Correct your spelling
some
parents
Use synonyms
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
childcare
Use synonyms
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
to keep their
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
till they work and some
parents
Use synonyms
keep their
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
with
grandfather
Correct pronoun usage
their grandfather
show examples
or grandmother. From these two things, some
parents
Use synonyms
think that
keepimg
Correct your spelling
keeping
their
child's
Change noun form
child
show examples
in
Use synonyms
childcare
Add an article
a childcare
show examples
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
is the best option. But some of the other
parents
Use synonyms
think that keeping their
child's
Change noun form
children
show examples
with
grandparents
Use synonyms
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
the best option. I will discuss both of these views and
then
Linking Words
illustrate my opinion. On the one
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
that keeping their
kids
Use synonyms
with
grandparents
Use synonyms
is the best option without keeping their
kids
Use synonyms
in
childcare
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
center
Fix the agreement mistake
centers
show examples
. Lots of
kids
Use synonyms
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
a good connection between grandfather and grandmother. There are
som
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
reasons for
this
Linking Words
. One of
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
is,
grandparents
Use synonyms
take
care
Use synonyms
of their
grandchilds
Correct your spelling
grandchild
grandchild's
from their
heart
Fix the agreement mistake
hearts
show examples
and
their
Replace the word
they're
they are
show examples
having a
blodd
Correct your spelling
good
connection between them too. So
kids
Use synonyms
are very friendly with their
gradparents
Correct your spelling
grandparents
and
grandparents
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
taking
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good
care
Use synonyms
of their
grandchilds
Correct your spelling
grandchildren
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Some
parents
Use synonyms
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
keeping their
kids
Use synonyms
in a
childcare
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
a good thing. Actually, keeping
kids
Use synonyms
in a
childcare
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
is a good thing because there are so many
kids
Use synonyms
in that place. So
kids
Use synonyms
can stay with lots of
kids
Use synonyms
and spend their time with them
happilly
Correct your spelling
happily
together.
Also
Linking Words
, in
childcare
Use synonyms
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
centers
Add a comma
centers,
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
take
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
care
Use synonyms
of
everyting
Correct your spelling
everything
. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, their doing activities with
kids
Use synonyms
,
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
feeding
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
kids
Use synonyms
, and
their make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
kids
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
study
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
. So
kids
Use synonyms
get used to
do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
their own things by them too.
To conclude
Linking Words
, My opinion is to keep
kids
Use synonyms
with
gradparents
Correct your spelling
grandparents
. Keeping
kids
Use synonyms
with their
grandparents
Use synonyms
is the best thing.
Becuase
Correct your spelling
Because
one thing is,
grandparents
Use synonyms
take
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
very good
care
Use synonyms
of their
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
, and the other thing is
kids
Use synonyms
vey
Correct your spelling
very
close to their
grandparents
Use synonyms
, so they can stay with them
happilly
Correct your spelling
happily
and freely too.
Submitted by shevonsavidhu14 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure logical progression between your ideas and paragraphs for a more cohesive structure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Begin with a clear introduction summarizing the essay's purpose and end with a conclusion that reflects back on the main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support your main points with clear reasoning or evidence to strengthen your argument.
Task Achievement
Ensure that you offer a balanced discussion on both views before giving your opinion to fully satisfy the task requirements.
Task Achievement
Use a range of linking words and paraphrase effectively to show your language capability and idea formation.
Task Achievement
Include relevant examples to support your arguments, making them specific and detailed to enrich the content of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • childcare centres
  • early child development
  • professional care
  • nurturing environment
  • family values
  • emotional stability
  • personalized attention
  • socialization skills
  • care styles
  • set routines
  • discipline
  • flexible schedules
  • peer interaction
  • professional training
  • dynamic accommodation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: