Some working parents think that childcare centres provide the best care for children who are still too young to go to school. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays lots of
parents
doin
jobs and working Correct your spelling
doin'
doing
on
their Change preposition
in
day to day
life. So Add a hyphen
day-to-day
soem
Correct your spelling
some
parents
using
Wrong verb form
use
childcare
centers
to keep their Change the spelling
centres
childs
till they work and some Correct your spelling
children
parents
keep their child
with Fix the agreement mistake
children
grandfather
or grandmother. From these two things, some Correct pronoun usage
their grandfather
parents
think that keepimg
their Correct your spelling
keeping
child's
in Change noun form
child
childcare
Add an article
a childcare
center
is the best option. But some of the other Change the spelling
centre
parents
think that keeping their child's
with Change noun form
children
grandparents
in
the best option. I will discuss both of these views and Correct your spelling
is
then
illustrate my opinion.
On the one hand
Add a comma
hand,
parents
thinks
that keeping their Change the verb form
think
kids
with grandparents
is the best option without keeping their kids
in childcare
center
. Lots of Fix the agreement mistake
centers
kids
having
a good connection between grandfather and grandmother. There are Wrong verb form
have
som
reasons for Correct your spelling
some
this
. One of it
is, Correct pronoun usage
them
grandparents
take care
of their grandchilds
from their Correct your spelling
grandchild
grandchild's
heart
and Fix the agreement mistake
hearts
their
having a Replace the word
they're
they are
blodd
connection between them too. So Correct your spelling
good
kids
are very friendly with their gradparents
and Correct your spelling
grandparents
grandparents
also
taking a
good Remove the article
apply
care
of their grandchilds
.
Correct your spelling
grandchildren
On the other hand
, Some parents
thinks
keeping their Change the verb form
think
kids
in a childcare
center
Change the spelling
centre
in
a good thing. Actually, keeping Correct your spelling
is
kids
in a childcare
center
is a good thing because there are so many Change the spelling
centre
kids
in that place. So kids
can stay with lots of kids
and spend their time with them happilly
together. Correct your spelling
happily
Also
, in childcare
Change the spelling
centres
centers
Add a comma
centers,
their
take Correct pronoun usage
they
a
Remove the article
apply
care
of everyting
. For Correct your spelling
everything
an
example, their doing activities with Correct article usage
apply
kids
, their
feeding Correct pronoun usage
apply
to
Change preposition
apply
kids
, and their make
Wrong verb form
making
kids
to
studyChange the verb form
apply
Rephrase
apply
also
. So kids
get used to do
their own things by them too.
Change the verb form
doing
To conclude
, My opinion is to keep kids
with gradparents
. Keeping Correct your spelling
grandparents
kids
with their grandparents
is the best thing. Becuase
one thing is, Correct your spelling
Because
grandparents
take a
very good Remove the article
apply
care
of their childs
, and the other thing is Correct your spelling
children
kids
vey
close to their Correct your spelling
very
grandparents
, so they can stay with them happilly
and freely too.Correct your spelling
happily
Submitted by shevonsavidhu14 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure logical progression between your ideas and paragraphs for a more cohesive structure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Begin with a clear introduction summarizing the essay's purpose and end with a conclusion that reflects back on the main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support your main points with clear reasoning or evidence to strengthen your argument.
Task Achievement
Ensure that you offer a balanced discussion on both views before giving your opinion to fully satisfy the task requirements.
Task Achievement
Use a range of linking words and paraphrase effectively to show your language capability and idea formation.
Task Achievement
Include relevant examples to support your arguments, making them specific and detailed to enrich the content of your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.