do you agree or disagree with the following statment?Telivission has destroyed comminucation amoung friends and family. use spesific reason to suppoert your opinion

In
globe
Replace the word
the global
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world,
television
has mainly defaulted as the main communication way for families and
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between loved ones.In
this
essay, I will
be discussing
Wrong verb form
discuss
show examples
Correct article usage
the
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benefits and disadvantages. On the one hand modern technological globe has fluctuating
tlivition
Correct your spelling
television
users by
enormous
Change the article
an enormous
the enormous
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number of families,
friends
and other business stakeholders.
Hence
,people got used to getting home after work and
then
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
straight into turning on their
television
with the expectation of getting some rest
as well as
gathering some information
while
getting entertainment events by watching
television
programs like news,podcasts
and
Correct word choice
apply
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movies etc.An instance when you watch news or
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
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it is beneficial to
you
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
communication and knowledge.
On the other hand
,I can supportably argue that watching
television
has destroyed communication between loved ones and
friends
due to
attitude
Correct article usage
the attitude
show examples
of moderate humans to watching their time by
passing-by
Correct your spelling
passing by
show examples
valuable time to gather some small amount of knowledge.For
example
Add a comma
example,
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new generation actions morelickly search straight in Google and gather information.
Moreover
,If you discuss with family and
friends
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your knowledge and ideas,it will benefit everyone who is involved and it can be a great time with loved ones.
To sum up
,there are both advantages and disadvantages,
However
, in my opinion, sharing your ideas and
express
Wrong verb form
expressing
show examples
them with family and
friends
rather than just sitting and watching
television
is more enjoyable and valuable
Submitted by nipunhasmitha97 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay struggles with a logical structure. Introduce each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and progress your ideas in a logical manner, ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a specific point related to the question.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and a conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and impact. Your introduction should clearly state your position on the topic, and the conclusion should effectively summarize your arguments and restate your position.
coherence cohesion
You provided some examples to support your claims, but they could be more specific and related directly to the question to strengthen your argument. Include clear and precise examples that directly support your view on the impact of television on communication.
task achievement
While you do address the question, the response is only partially complete. You touch upon the topic but fail to fully develop your argument. Expand on your ideas and explore the implications of the statement, providing a balanced discussion.
task achievement
Your ideas are not clearly articulated and comprehensive. Aim to express your opinions with clarity, and elaborate on them to fully convey your viewpoint on the impact of television on communication.
task achievement
Your use of examples is adequate but lacks detail and specificity. Always aim to include relevant and specific illustrations that support your point of view more convincingly.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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