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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows social and economic indicators for four countries in 1994, according to United Nations statistics. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows social and economic indicators for four countries in 1994, according to United Nations statistics. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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This
Linking Words
 table demonstrates the economic and social indicators for four countries
Canada
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,
Japan
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, Peru,
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Zaire
Correct word choice
and Zaire
show examples
.
According to
Linking Words
 United Nations statistics. The Annual income per person in
Japan
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 is 1570 US dollars
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is the highest income compared to
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the other countries,
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
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 the lowest country income is
Zaire
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 with each citizen taking 130 USD, which is a significant difference. Canadaians earn 11100 dollars which is less than less than the average Japanese taking 15760 US dollars, Peru’s earnings
is
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are
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 higher than
Zaire
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’s by $30
at
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apply
show examples
recording $160. The life expectancy in
Canada
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 is the second highest of the group at 76 just slightly lower than
Japan
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, wages,
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Zaire
Change preposition
in Zaire
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 the lowest and Peru is higher than
Zaire
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.
Canada
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 recorded the highest number in the daily calorie supply per person at 3326. Just below
Canada
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 is
Japan
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 at 2846,
Zaire
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 is by far the lowest country for calorie intake at 1749 a day,
Canada
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 and
Japan
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 recorded the same percentage of adult literacy rate at 99 per cent.
These
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This
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 figure falls to 68
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 in Peru and, 34 per cent in
Zaire
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words canada, japan, zaire with synonyms.
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