IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Mrs Barrett, An English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for some to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett, in your letter. Suggest how you could help her in her home Say why you would like to do this work Explain when you will and will not be available

#mrs #barrett #woman #lives #town #home #hours #summer #work
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Dear Mrs Barrett, I am writing
this
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 letter to inform you of my expression about your advertisement, I am so glad if you want me to help you in your home the next summer for a little hour. Let me tell you about my opinion if you don't mind my suggestion in the morning, I prefer
this
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 time it is useful to do something and finish early. I will come to your home, and we have drawn some schedule for our chores to be perfect. As you know, I am a student and, in the summer, I don't have any time for lessons, so I like to help you to expand my experience and knowledge if you allow to me help you, I would be grateful and delighted. I will tell you about my plan for summer the first period of
this
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 month I will be free, but the
last
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 that I will not be here, as well, I will travel to my parents in another city. But
also
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, I agree if you would like my assistant to spend some time with you and it will be a magnificent chance for my certificate. I look forward to receiving your response soon. Yours faithfully, Monirah
Submitted by M on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a clear and distinct idea related to the topic. Your paragraphs seem to mix different ideas which make it hard to follow.
greeting and closing
Start the letter with an appropriate salutation and end with a suitable closing. While you did close the letter properly, the opening could be more polite and engaging.
task achievement
Address all parts of the prompt clearly in your letter. While you have offered your help and availability, you should also explain why you wish to work with Mrs Barrett and how your skills or experience make you a suitable candidate.
suitable writing tone
Maintain a tone that is polite and reflects the formality of a job application. The tone in your letter at times is too casual for the setting.
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