Some people think that it is good for a country's cultures to show imported foreign films and TV programs. Other people think that a country should develop their own films and TV programs instead. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the past few years, there has been an ever-growing debate about the country's
culture
. One group of people think that it would be more beneficial if the country presented foreign
films
and programs,
while
, others see it as better to develop their own
films
and TV shows. Every team member is totally convinced about their own opinion. The goal of
this
essay is to discuss both sides before a reasoned conclusion is found. On the one hand, many people argue that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
their
culture
may benefit from international media production, which may be more advanced than the national.
also
may open local populations’ eyes to different literature ,which in turn, may not only, enrich the crowds’ cognition, but
also
, widen their minds and horizons.
For instance
, being widely popular, Netflix contributed significantly to developing much human literature.
That is
why many people support
this
trend.
On the other hand
, there are several counters to
this
argument. others assume that their country must have their own movies and local shows. To illustrate every community has its own customs and traditions,
in other words
, what seems to be correct and viable in a society, may be completely incorrect in another one.
For example
wearing extremely short clothes in
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
countries,
such
as European countries, is normal,
while
in contrast,
this
is a shame in Egypt.
Thus
, it is easy to see why
this
argument garnered a lot of support. In conclusion, after looking at both sides of
this
discussion, my personal sentiments are on par with the idea that each society should have its own TV programs and
films
that fit its own
culture
,
instead
of importing
foriegn
Correct your spelling
foreign
films
or media programs, which would be absolutely non advantgeous to the national
culture
.
Submitted by moo.elnokrashy on

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task achievement
Despite the clear attempt to address the task, the main points are not fully developed and lack specific examples to substantiate the arguments. Be sure to provide clear examples that directly support your points and arguments.
coherence cohesion
The overall structure of the essay requires improvement to enhance clarity. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and progresses logically. Utilize linking words effectively and avoid abrupt topic shifts.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion should clearly address the prompt, but they need to be more developed to reflect a comprehensive understanding of the topic. Work on crafting succinct and relevant openings and closings that encapsulate the main issues discussed.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural exchange
  • global connectivity
  • revenue
  • cultural homogenization
  • traditional values
  • nurturing
  • job creation
  • cultural preservation
  • production values
  • genres
  • national pride
  • representation
  • government policies
  • censorship
  • cultural adaptation
  • storytelling
  • imported content
  • domestic productions
  • media landscape
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