Is it important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, globalisation has opened many opportunities to level up people’s
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
in
personal and professional. Change preposition
apply
However
, they should take risks
as requirements to get
career advancement in Verb problem
achieve
Correct article usage
the workplace
workplace
and have good resilience and adaptability in their Correct article usage
the workplace
life
. This
essay will elaborate how
important people Change preposition
on how
take
Fix the infinitive
to take
risks
in evolving the
quality of Change the word
their
life
.
People’s demand in
basic needs, like property and Change preposition
for
grocery
become higher time by time as high as goods Fix the agreement mistake
groceries
price
in Fix the agreement mistake
prices
global
market. Add an article
the global
This
situation encourages people to have long-work
hours, Correct your spelling
long work
then
it enables them to get career advancement for
earning Change preposition
by
higher
salary. That condition must be supported with good professional development, Add an article
a higher
such
as international professional training which takes much money, time, and effort. Unfortunately, those sacrifices will not guarantee the workers to be
level up from their job position, especially in big or multinational companies. Unnecessary verb
apply
That is
because
a high-competitive skill among employees on performance. Add the preposition
because of
For example
, in a bad case, they could get field in promotion. However
, even though workers experience unselected in
Change preposition
apply
promotion
, they will become certified international well-trained Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
employee
as they Fix the agreement mistake
employees
put
attention Verb problem
pay
on
professional development, as their Change preposition
to
risks
. In
another chance, if there is a good opportunity in other companies which offer higher Change preposition
On
salary
, they probably will be selected easily.
It is Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
same
important in Correct word choice
apply
personal
Correct pronoun usage
my personal
life
as well. Every person must have a
good resilience and adaptability in Remove the article
apply
globalisation
era. Those survival skills have to Correct article usage
the globalisation
build
by taking some Wrong verb form
be built
risks
like travel
and Wrong verb form
travelling
live
alone in a Wrong verb form
living
country
. For example
, International students have to travel and live in another country
just by themselves. They must learn a new language and survive with
the weather Change preposition
apply
condition
which Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
is
extremely different from Correct subject-verb agreement
are
origin
Correct article usage
the origin
country
. Moreover
, they might have social problem
like Fix the agreement mistake
problems
language
barrier, or get sick because of extreme weather. But, if students are able to tackle the situation, they Correct article usage
a language
would
elevate their personal skills in social, rather than Wrong verb form
will
they
just Correct pronoun usage
apply
live
in their Wrong verb form
living
country
and do
not Verb problem
apply
take
any Wrong verb form
taking
risk
.
In conclusion, taking Fix the agreement mistake
risks
risks
in professional development to get
career advancement and in personal Verb problem
achieve
life
to build good resilience and adaptability are important. It
is because globalisation requires good personal and professional skills.Correct pronoun usage
This
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Be sure to organize your ideas more clearly to improve logical structure. Use paragraphs effectively to separate topics and ideas for better reader understanding.
Coherence & Cohesion
Pay closer attention to the wording of the question and make sure that your introduction and conclusion directly address the question asked. Refrain from being generic.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop your main points further by using a mix of complex sentences and clear, supporting examples. This ensures each point is robust and contributes to the overall argument.
Task Achievement
Make sure your response fully covers all parts of the task. Each aspect should be explored fully and concluded with a clear personal stance to show a complete response.
Task Achievement
Work on clarity by rephrasing complex ideas in a more straightforward manner, ensuring that comprehensive ideas are not obfuscated by overly complex language or unclear expressions.
Task Achievement
To effectively use examples, ensure they are specific, highly relevant, and well-explained to support the respective points being made. Avoid general statements that do not offer concrete evidence.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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