In the past, most employed people went to a place of work to do their jobs. These days, more and more people are choosing work from home. What are the reasons for this change? Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays, employed
people
prefer to
work
from
home
instead
of doing an offline job in an office like they did in the past. From my point of view,
this
condition has occurred as an impact of advanced technology and a wide range of types of jobs. Given that there is an increasing number of
people
who are doing their occupation from
home
day by day, I believe that it is included in a negative development for not only individual
people
but
also
the
government
. In terms of the advanced technology in today’s world, usually, many employers prefer to do their
work
online in their homes
instead
of going to an office. It is because they think that
this
way is easier to do and they can have more effective time management.
Moreover
, the popularity of working from
home
can be caused by broad types of
work
that are more likely to be conducted online
such
as online learning and online shopping.
For example
, the learning process can be done online since there are numerous digital platforms that can be used. Teachers can conduct online classes by using
Zoom
Correct article usage
the Zoom
show examples
application,
while
students can directly join the online platform to have a class.
However
,
this
notion can result in disastrous consequences both for individual
people
and the
government
. First and foremost, there will be a destructive impact in terms of health conditions among the citizens.
According to
Peter, a researcher from The University of Sydney, many workers who do their job online are more likely to suffer from certain illnesses like eye disease and other illnesses.
This
is because they are normally not getting enough movement compared with what they did in the past when they went to an office to do a job.
In other words
, they often have a screen addiction
as a result
of doing
work
from
home
with their electronic devices.
Furthermore
, the
government
usually have to provide better infrastructures experiencing the trend of working from
home
.
For instance
, the
government
should spend a high expenditure on allocating the need for
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
among societies, and
this
condition can result in a negative impact on the nation’s economy. In conclusion, even though working from
home
has become popular these days, there are too many disadvantages that
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
arisen from
this
case to be considered a positive development.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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coherence cohesion
The essay provides a discernible introduction and conclusion, which is important for structure. However, better link words and paragraphing could enhance the logical flow of the essay. Additionally, main ideas are somewhat supported but could be developed further with more coherent explanations and transitions.
task achievement
The task is only partially complete as the essay does not fully address both parts of the question regarding the reasons for the change and whether it is a positive or negative development. To improve, ensure that all components of the prompt are clearly and fully addressed with ample explanations and support for each point.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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