IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The table below shows the income and expenditure of Harckley Hall, a public place for hiring over the period of three years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the income and expenditure of Harckley Hall, a public place for hiring over the period of three years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#income #expenditure #harckley #hall #place #period #three #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The data below gives information about the annual
income
 and expenses of Harckley Hall in
three
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
years
Correct your spelling
three-year
show examples
 period.
Overall
, the progressive source of
income
 comes from the cafe,
in contrast
 with funding from local
council
Fix the agreement mistake
councils
show examples
 and other bodies that
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
keep plummeting down throughout the
year
.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
show examples
 money gained from
hiring
Correct article usage
the hiring
show examples
 room is relatively
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
as well as
 the total
income
 and the expenditure. In reference to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
income
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Harckley Hall gets around 70.000
poundsterlings
Correct your spelling
pound sterlings
pound sterling
 per
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
, with the hired room responsible for the highest proportion
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every
year
,
account
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 33.000, 34.000, and 32.000 respectively.
On the other hand
, the funding from other bodies and from
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
 council rank second and third by approximately 20.000
poundsterlings
Correct your spelling
pound sterlings
pound sterling
 per
year
eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
 the number dips by the next
year
.
Last
, the cafe gives a small but positive growth of money with 3.000
poundsterling
Correct your spelling
pound sterling
 in the initial
year
, increases to 4000 and 6000 in the following years.
Whereas
 the expenditure keeps climbing with only 66.000
poundsterlings
Correct your spelling
pound sterling
pound sterlings
 in the first
year
 to just over 70.000
poundsterling
Correct your spelling
pound sterling
 in the
last
year
, with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak of 74.000
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the second
year
.
Submitted by maukaburtubel on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words income, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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