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Writing Samples
Band 4

Weddings are getting bigger and more expensive. What is the reason for this? Is it a positive or negative developIments?

#weddings #reason #developiments
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Wedding
Fix the agreement mistake
Weddings
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 are
connection
Correct article usage
a connection
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 between two beautiful souls and wonderful families, but some
people
Use synonyms
 make it
as
Correct your spelling
a
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 big approach to show off and other
people
Use synonyms
wants
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
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 to make it memorable for life
time
Correct your spelling
lifetime
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.
This
Linking Words
 development
have
Change the verb form
has
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 some drawbacks
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
some
people
Use synonyms
 think it is based on their status in society. On of one hand,
people
Use synonyms
 spend
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 to make
wedding
Fix the agreement mistake
weddings
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 attractive and
speacial
Correct your spelling
special
. They like to appoint marriage planners, who take care
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
everthing
Correct your spelling
everything
 from food to decorations. They provide ideas based on
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
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 of
client
Add an article
the client
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 want to make their wedding stand out in their social circle and leave an impact on their minds. In some
weddings
Use synonyms
,
groom
Correct article usage
the groom
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 and
bride
Use synonyms
 side families offer expensive gifts to
eachother
Correct your spelling
each other
,
this
Linking Words
 approach is good if it is not hurting anyone's
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
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 and not ripping their pockets.
In contrast
Linking Words
, these big cost
weddings
Use synonyms
, make some
people
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
spend out of their budget to make their high standards in society. Even, in
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 areas of
asian
Change the capitalization
Asian
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 countries
people
Use synonyms
 ask for
dowry
Correct article usage
a dowry
show examples
, which
is putting
Wrong verb form
puts
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 pressure on
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the bride
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bride
Change noun form
bride's
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 family. Some
people
Use synonyms
 cannot afford high investments
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
wedding
Correct article usage
a wedding
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, but after looking at big
wedding
Fix the agreement mistake
weddings
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 they demand from
Use synonyms
bride
Correct article usage
the bride
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 side.
This
Linking Words
 approach
is giving
Verb problem
apply
show examples
stress
Correct subject-verb agreement
stresses
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 to
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the bride
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bride
Change noun form
bride's
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 parents. In conclusion,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
weddings
Use synonyms
 should have one settled budget by
higer
Correct your spelling
higher
authories
Correct your spelling
authorities
authorises
 to avoid any stress on
lower income
Add a hyphen
lower-income
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 families. In
this
Linking Words
 way, some greedy
people
Use synonyms
 will not demand big
weddings
Use synonyms
 and it will lower
down
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the pressure of spending
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
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 amount on marriage.
Simple
Add an article
A simple
The simple
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 wedding needs to be introduced to avoid
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Change noun form
society's
show examples
 pressure.
This
Linking Words
 idea will help many
people
Use synonyms
 to maintain their pockets and make their lives easier.
Submitted by simran.ghariall on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure clarity in the introduction by directly addressing the question without ambiguity and make a clear argument.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to manage the flow of arguments more effectively.
supported main points
Provide more relevant specific examples to support your points and elaborate on these examples to demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
complete response
Task response could be improved by ensuring a clear position throughout the response and providing a conclusion that encapsulates the primary arguments made.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive to present comprehensive ideas that address all parts of the task; this includes examining both reasons and the implications of the phenomenon.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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