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Band 6.5

In many countries today, parents are able to choose to send their childen to single-sex schools or co-educational schools. Some people think that children going to single-sex schools have disadvantages later in life.  To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #parents #childen #schools #people #children #life
In contemporary society, every parent has plenty of school options available for providing a bedrock for learning. Some parents
Add a missing verb
are incline
show examples
incline
Replace the word
inclined
show examples
 towards unisex learning institutes.
However
, a fraction of people
believes
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
 that
gender-specific
 colleges can have demerits for youngsters later in life. I agree with
this
 statement to some extent
due to
 a variety of concerns.
This
 essay will expound on both sides of the argument and will provide a conclusion after discussing the demerits and merits of both types of schooling. On the one hand, few parents give priority to single-sex schools
due to
 a number of concerns with the
co-education
system
. One major concern related to mixed education is the safety of female
students
.
For instance
,
According to
 a few research surveys, it is proved that the safety of female
students
 is a major concern for their parents
due to
 cases of sexual harassment from male figures. Another big reason for selecting a
gender-specific
 school is a more comfortable atmosphere in the
gender-specific
 institute. As mostly females feel more comfortable and secure in a girls' campus where they can openly discuss their personal issues
such
 as menstruation cycle and other illnesses, which can not be discussed openly in a co-learning
system
.
On the other hand
, few people insist on giving priority to the
co-education
system
due to
 various factors.
Firstly
, one of the big factors is a lack of confidence in most of the
students
 who belong to
gender-specific
 institutions. These
students
 don't have enough confidence to express their views with other genders. Most of them can not hold a conversation and can not get attention in front of a large audience.
Moreover
,
students
 who learn in a
co-education
system
 have more confidence and interpersonal skills which make them more successful in later stages of life. In conclusion, I vehemently oppose the idea of single-sex educational institutions. In my opinion, the
co-education
system
 provides more learning opportunities for youngsters.
Consequently
, the
co-education
system
 should be supported by parental figures to provide a better future for the young generation.
Submitted by sb101tahirgul on

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task achievement
Consider expanding on your introduction with a clearer thesis statement that directly addresses the extent to which you agree or disagree.
task achievement
In your conclusion, revisit the key points made throughout the essay to summarize your stance more effectively.
task achievement
Ensure a balanced discussion of both views with clear examples before stating your own position.
coherence cohesion
Maintain logical sequencing of ideas and paragraphs; transition words or phrases can be used more effectively to create smoother links between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Develop main points with more specific examples or data to strengthen your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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