It is sometimes said that social media friends are not real friends? Give out your opinion?

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Today,
people
Use synonyms
are spending a lot of time on social
media
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and relying too much on their networks. Some elites believe friendships on social
media
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are not real. I agree with
this
Linking Words
statement because
people
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spend time on social
media
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for entertainment
not
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, not
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new commitments
as well as
Linking Words
they publish wrong
information
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about their lives.
Firstly
Linking Words
, social
media
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are made for entertainment.
People
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usually spend time on social
media
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to get rid of daily stress, they are not there to make new commitments.
For example
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, if two persons find each other content
intresting
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interesting
on Instagram, they would start
intracting
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interacting
with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
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.
As a result
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,
although
Linking Words
they may feel they are friends, in the case of any problem, their online friends are out of reach. Not only because they are remote, but
also
Linking Words
because they are seeking fun not new problems.
Secondly
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, social
media
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are full of fake
information
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. Either to protect their privacy or to scam other humans, many users use
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
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information
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on their profiles.
As a consequence
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, after falling in love with a beautiful girl, she is likely to be a boy using a fake profile as a girl.
Moreover
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, without any intention to use fake data, the public
are
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is
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highly unlikely to publish their real lives.
For instance
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, a lot of users are not professional
blogers
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bloggers
,
thereafter
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, they only publish posts when they are happy.
Therefore
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, It is highly likely to establish a friendship based on the wrong
information
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which makes the friendship fake.
Inconclusion
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In conclusion
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, I strongly believe social
media
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friendships are not real. On one hand,
people
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are seeking fun on social
media
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not
Add the comma(s)
, not
show examples
new relations.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
information
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published on social
media
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are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
not
trust worthy
Correct your spelling
trustworthy
show examples
.
Submitted by AUser on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. You should ensure each paragraph follows a clear line of thought, from the topic sentence to supporting sentences and a concluding sentence.
coherence cohesion
Both introduction and conclusion are present but could be strengthened. The introduction should more directly address the prompt, and the conclusion should more effectively summarize the main points of your argument without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
The main points in each paragraph require further development. Use more detailed examples, and ensure that the support you provide directly relates to the topic sentences and the overall thesis of the essay.
task achievement
To fully respond to the task, you must address all parts of the question. Ensure you have thoroughly covered the topic, including providing a more nuanced discussion on the nature of real friendships versus social media friendships.
task achievement
Your ideas are present but need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Strive for greater clarity in your argumentation and use linking words to connect your ideas effectively.
task achievement
The essay lacks relevant and specific examples. Providing detailed and concrete examples strengthens your argument and helps the reader understand your point of view.
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