The graph shows the proportion of energy that was produced from coal in four European countries from 1995 to 2010.

The graph shows the proportion of energy that was produced from coal in four European countries from 1995 to 2010.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph delineates the
production
Use synonyms
of
energy
Use synonyms
from coal in Sweden,
France
Use synonyms
,
Denmark
Use synonyms
, and
Germany
Use synonyms
. Looking from an all perspective, it is clearly evident that all selected European countries have dropped gradually in relation to their
energy
Use synonyms
produced by coal over
15-year
Add an article
a 15-year
show examples
period, with an
execption
Correct your spelling
exception
of
Germany
Use synonyms
which once experienced a slight increase. In 1995,
France
Use synonyms
had the lowest
production
Use synonyms
percentage, settled at 30%.
Denmark
Use synonyms
,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, had the highest
energy
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
, which was recorded at 60%. In the subsequent 15 years, the trend for both
France
Use synonyms
and
Denmark
Use synonyms
had fallen considerably. In 2010,
Denmark
Use synonyms
became the country with
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
coal
production
Use synonyms
shown by the significant 50% decrease throughout
15 year
Correct your spelling
the 15-year
period, registered at 10%.
Conversely
Linking Words
, despite the fluctuation,
France
Use synonyms
had settled their percentage at below 30% in 2010. Upon closer examination
Change preposition
of
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
the figures, the trend for
France
Use synonyms
and Sweden
Correct subject-verb agreement
depicts
show examples
depict
Correct subject-verb agreement
depicts
show examples
Correct article usage
a roughly
show examples
roughly
Correct article usage
a roughly
show examples
similar
Fix the agreement mistake
patterns
show examples
pattern
Fix the agreement mistake
patterns
show examples
Change preposition
from
show examples
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
1995 until 2010.
Although
Linking Words
both countries
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced
decrease
Replace the word
a decreasing
show examples
trend throughout
15 year
Correct your spelling
the 15-year
period, Sweden
has
Verb problem
was
show examples
shown as the
highest
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
country with its coal
energy
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
28%, still higher than
France
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
for
Germany
Use synonyms
and
Denmark
Use synonyms
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
emerged
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
complimentary pattern in 2007 with the mark of
significant
Add an article
a significant
the significant
show examples
drop
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
's lowest
energy
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
which registered at below 10%. Over the next 3 years,
Germany
Use synonyms
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced
remarkable
Add an article
a remarkable
show examples
increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
their produced
energy
Use synonyms
from coal with
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
percentage
Change to a plural noun
percentages
show examples
recorded at approximately 18%.
Submitted by chastinervine on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words production, energy, france, denmark, germany with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: