IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

It is impossible to help all the people in the world who need help, so governments should help people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #world #governments #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It's been argued about
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
assisstant
Correct your spelling
assistant
 to everybody in the world who are in need that it is unattainable , which I believe that questionable,
also
Linking Words
 don't agree with that because wealthy
countries
Use synonyms
 can help the
people
Use synonyms
 who need
Add an article
the grant
show examples
grant
Fix the agreement mistake
grants
show examples
 and give those
people
Use synonyms
 basic life support like food and
accomodations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
accommodation
,
for example
Linking Words
 like the
refeguee
Correct your spelling
refugee
referee
 or the
countries
Use synonyms
 under the siege of
war
Add an article
the war
show examples
 . In my point of view , rich
countries
Use synonyms
 could help
people
Use synonyms
whom
Change the pronoun
who
show examples
 been migrated from their own
countries
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 the war ,which
helping
Change the form of the verb
helps
show examples
 them will even give them a better
reputations
Correct the article-noun agreement
reputation
show examples
,it will characterised by humanity ,
Correct word choice
and
show examples
also
Linking Words
 can lead to
a cultures diversity
Change to a genitive case
the diversity of a culture
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
 , America provide
Ukrainian
Replace the word
Ukrainians
show examples
which fighting the siege of war with a lot of financial aid and food .
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , wealthy
countries
Use synonyms
 can assist
people
Use synonyms
whom
Change the pronoun
who
show examples
 migrate from their
counteries
Correct your spelling
countries
 and give them
accomodations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
accommodation
,
as a
Linking Words
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
 they can live a peaceful life with kind
people
Use synonyms
 that treat them with respect .
To
Change preposition
In
show examples
 conclusion , I see that wealthy
countries
Use synonyms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a lot of options which can help the
people
Use synonyms
 in need in multiple ways
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that it will take the benefits of
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 reputation and will have a variety of cultures in the same time it helps
people
Use synonyms
whom
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 will be thankful
to
Change the preposition
for
show examples
 that country all their lives .
Submitted by Ayah3li96 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Ensure the opening paragraph clearly presents your viewpoint on the topic and outlines the main points you will discuss. The introduction should set the stage for the rest of the essay.
Paragraph Structure
Careful planning of paragraphs is necessary, and each paragraph should have a clear main idea followed by supporting sentences that develop that idea. Adding topic sentences can help with this.
Linking
Work on the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas, ensuring cohesion throughout the essay.
Examples
To strengthen your argument, integrate specific examples that are directly relevant to your main points. Avoid general statements and aim to provide details that substantiate your argument.
Responding to the Task
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the task by presenting a clear position throughout the response, with relevant, extended and supported ideas that answer the question.
Conclusion
Revisit the conclusion to definitively summarize your argument and reiterate your viewpoint, making the purpose of the essay clear to the reader.
Language
Pay close attention to spelling, vocabulary, and grammatical structures to avoid errors that might obscure the meaning of your sentences.
Word Count
Increase word count to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words for task 2 essays.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: