Topic: Governments shoud spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?
One of the most important infrastructures to improve civilization is routes that connect different parts of
a
society Remove the article
apply
according to
their geographical zones. Railways
and roads
can be mentioned among them. Some individuals believe more mony
should Correct your spelling
money
be spend
on Change the verb form
be spent
railways
rather than roads
. In this
essay
I will consider Add a comma
essay,
benefits
of Correct article usage
the benefits
this
idea and also
benefits
of expanding Correct article usage
the benefits
of
the Change preposition
apply
roads
.
In a point of view, railways
are for all population in a country and it is not matter
where to Change the verb form
does not matter
stalished
. It is used for many goals, Correct your spelling
established
for instance
, either journeys or transporting goods. In addition
, fast transporting
causes Replace the word
transport
to
Change preposition
apply
a
speedy Correct article usage
apply
developement
. In another point of view, Correct your spelling
development
railways
need less budget to set up and maintaining
. So, with equal money Change the form of the verb
maintain
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
source
more Add a comma
source,
connection
will be made.
Fix the agreement mistake
connections
In
the other hand, the Change preposition
On
car making
Add a hyphen
car-making
industy
which is the biggest industry in the world needs Correct your spelling
industry
roads
to keeps
its survival. Wrong verb form
keep
Also
, transporting by car and the related aspects permit individuals to consider their favorites
. Change the spelling
favourites
In addition
, routs
made by Correct your spelling
routes
roads
povide
more facilities for Correct your spelling
provide
leasuring
time Correct your spelling
leisure
compare
to Wrong verb form
compared
railways
. The thing to point out it
, Correct your spelling
is
roads
are used to
Change preposition
for
non-infrustractures
of human being reality of life and they play roles as a kind of tools to provide more Correct your spelling
non-infrastructures
non-infrastructure
incomes
for companies and other producers.
Fix the agreement mistake
income
To sum up
, each transporting
system has its value. In my opinion, Replace the word
transportation
sience goverments
spend the wealth sources Correct your spelling
since governments
belong
to Wrong verb form
belonging
population
, they should Correct article usage
the population
stablish
more Correct your spelling
establish
railways
than roads
. Because it helps human society to increase its facilities more than roads
that are made just for consumarization
.Correct your spelling
consumption
Submitted by h.dibabiotech on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure by properly organizing your ideas into clear paragraphs, each with a clear main point. Consider using linking words and phrases to smoothly transition from one idea to the next and to highlight relationships between points.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but could be developed further. The introduction should explicitly state your position on the topic, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your arguments and restate your stance. Aim to make these sections more impactful.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with specific examples. General statements should be enriched with precise details or statistics that can convincingly illustrate your argument and reinforce your position on the topic.
task achievement
Address the task directly by giving a well-explained argument whether you agree or disagree, with corresponding reasons. Expand on these points to fully develop your essay. Avoid general statements that do not directly contribute to the argument.
task achievement
Strive to present clear and comprehensive ideas by developing each argument thoroughly, making sure they are relevant to the essay prompt, and avoiding repetition or overly general statements.
task achievement
Incorporate relevant and specific examples that are directly related to your arguments and the topic at hand. Such examples significantly strengthen your essay by demonstrating real-world application and validity of your points.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite