New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

whether we like it or not, over the past few decades, modern

technologies

Use synonyms

have transformed virtually all aspects of individuals' lives and youngsters' leisure

time

Use synonyms

is no exception.

Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

has both merits and demerits, in a more personal view, the disadvantages are greater than the advantages. To commence with, enormous importance has been laid on how new

technologies

Use synonyms

affect

children

Use synonyms

's free

time

Use synonyms

. A fundamental criterion would be that thanks to the Internet, a wide variety of activities are constantly available free of charge to youths from various animations to distinct VR games.

For instance

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

happened to my six-year-old niece who has a burning desire for Disney animations,

hence

Linking Words

she watched loads of these animations on YouTube without bothering her parents.

In other words

Linking Words

, modern

technologies

Use synonyms

give a hand to

children

Use synonyms

to enjoy their free

time

Use synonyms

by doing their desired activity without disturbing others. There are,

however

Linking Words

, numerous downsides to the mentioned movement, First and foremost, a vast ratio of young

children

Use synonyms

allocate their free

time

Use synonyms

to playing online games rather than spending

time

Use synonyms

with their parents and friends face-to-face,

thus

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

would have a detrimental effect on their communication skills.

For example

Linking Words

, a recent survey in my country suggested that nowadays a staggering amount of youths use their iPads in their free

time

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of learning new skills

such

Linking Words

as drawing with their loved ones.

Secondly

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

recent

technologies

Use synonyms

, countless amounts of uncensored content are displayed to younger ones watching them in their free

time

Use synonyms

, which has resulted in a sharp rise in domestic violence,

as well as

Linking Words

committing to crime.

In other words

Linking Words

, digital

technologies

Use synonyms

have a dangerous effect on

children

Use synonyms

's characteristic traits.

To conclude

Linking Words

, undoubtedly, the pattern in which younger ones spend their leisure

time

Use synonyms

remarkably changed

as a consequence

Linking Words

of new

technologies

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

has positive and negative notes, in my opinion, given the causes above, everything can be recapitulated into the fact that the advantages are outnumbered by the disadvantages.

maryam.niknammSun Jan 07 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph naturally follows from the one before it and leads into the next. Paragraph transition phrases can be helpful.

coherence cohesion

The essay could benefit from varied sentence structures to demonstrate linguistic flexibility and complexity.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are present but could provide a clearer framework for the essay's argument, strengthening the overall position taken.

task achievement

Be cautious not to oversimplify or overgeneralize statements. Offering nuanced views or acknowledging exceptions could enrich the essay's argument.

task achievement

Adding more detailed examples can further support the main points and enhance the argument's strength and validity.

task achievement

Task response is adequate but aim to explore the implications or contrasts between the advantages and disadvantages in more depth for a stronger analysis.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

327 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people believed that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven year old. other believe that it is important for your children to go to school as soon as possible. what do you thing are the advantages of attending school from young children.
The debate over whether minors should stay at home or go to school is a sensitive and complex one. While some argue the importance of the stability and nurture provided to the young by staying at home is essential for their happiness and development, others highlight the need for socialising the children from a young age by sending them to school and integrating them with society. In my view, an adolescent at the age of six or seven should start school to develop much-needed social and emotional intelligence and to better set the child up for life. In this essay, I will be discussing both perspectives and provide a conclusion.
6
band
As we are facing more and more problems, which affect the whole planet, good relationships between different countries are becoming more important than ever before. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays global issues are rising very rapidly due to which maintaining good relationships with other nations is considered to be essential. I agree with this statement because I think coronavirus pandemic has proved why different countries should work together as one and at times of natural calamities taking help from other countries is very important in order to save the lives of many people.
5
band
In the future all cars, uses and trucks will be dirverless. This only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advatages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays it is argued that having an education life abroad is an exciting posibility while others think studying in the country where they were born is better. Although, I totally agree with the opinion which says studying in another country is better. This essay will demonstrate the advantages of both assessments.
7.5
band
Some countries are struggling with an increase rate in crime. Many people think that increasing police on the roads is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree ?
It is quite common these days for people to become famous through appearing in TV programs and the internet. This trend would create certain benefits but there will also be some drawbacks. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this method of pursuing fame.
5.5
band
Formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student's performance. Continual assessment such as coursework and projects is not a satisfactory way to do this. Do you agree or disagree?
Why are examinations conducted in the first place? It provides the proof of knowledge. Analysis of knowledge can be evaluated in a lot of different ways and I don't believe that the traditional system is the perfect way to do this. This point will be justified by discussing the way students work around using memorization method and syllabus not being updated every year.

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Your opinion

Some people believed that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven year old. other believe that it is important for your children to go to school as soon as possible. what do you thing are the advantages of attending school from young children.

As we are facing more and more problems, which affect the whole planet, good relationships between different countries are becoming more important than ever before. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the future all cars, uses and trucks will be dirverless. This only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advatages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some countries are struggling with an increase rate in crime. Many people think that increasing police on the roads is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree ?

Formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student's performance. Continual assessment such as coursework and projects is not a satisfactory way to do this. Do you agree or disagree?