IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Cohabitation is believed to bring huge advantages for young people since it enables them to fully understand each other before deciding to get married. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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The topic above addresses that many societies believe that
cohabitation
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 is a way to bridge the two people who are getting married and understand each other in terms of communication and understanding. I fully agree to
this
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 matter. I speak of
this
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 as married-life training, which does not only talk about beauty and wealth but
also
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 about the necessity of a calm mind and better communication with our
partner
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.
First,
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marriage is different from so many relationships, like boyfriend and girlfriend. Once they are married, they have a spouse to look for until the end of the day. That's why
cohabitation
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 is a way to express their true self to another
partner
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. Knowing each other without hesitation in
real time
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real-time
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 is what every
partner
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 needs to tackle any problems ahead.
For example
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, in three years of relationship, a friend of mine never knows that their
partner
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 is afraid of bugs. After implementing
cohabitation
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, she
finally
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 knew it and could communicate how to handle it in the future.
Second,
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to be married means choosing the best of the best partners in the world. Shall we avoid the worst even if miscommunications have already occurred
.
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?
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Cohabitation
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, once again, is
such
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 a way to implement better communication in routines. Any doubts before marriage can be said when the event begins to fix the will of the sacral (marriage). Many people,
for instance
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, are easily getting divorced because of miscommunication, they don't fully understand their partners and easily decide to get married. So, in a nutshell,
cohabitation
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 needs to be implemented by each
partner
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 who will get married to fully understand how
to begin
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 a life and continuously live with
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partner
Add an article
a partner
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 forever and avoid the worst events.

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coherence cohesion
It is paramount that you structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. While your essay does contain these elements, it lacks a strong thesis statement and clear topic sentences that preview what each paragraph will discuss. It is important to outline the main points clearly in the introduction and to preface each paragraph with a topic sentence.
task achievement
Make sure to address the task fully by presenting a balanced argument with a clear opinion. You did express agreement with the statement, but you should provide a clear, nuanced argument that also considers potential counterarguments or diverse perspectives. Additionally, your conclusion would be more effective if it restated your main points and the rationale behind your opinion, providing a definitive position.
task achievement
To increase your score in the area of task achievement, aim to develop your ideas fully, provide specific examples that are directly linked to your arguments, and ensure that these examples are elaborated to demonstrate how they support your viewpoint. Personal anecdotes can be powerful, but they must be clearly relevant and detailed enough to substantiate your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • compatibility
  • habits
  • preferences
  • conflict-resolution
  • deal-breakers
  • financial responsibilities
  • domestic tasks
  • realistic view
  • emotional trust
  • deepening the bond
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