8/1 The line graph shows the information average number of visitors entering a museum in summer and winter in 2003.

8/1 The line graph shows the information average number of visitors entering a museum in summer and winter in 2003.
The line graph illustrates the average number of
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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who
came
Wrong verb form
come
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to
museum
Add an article
the museum
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in
Change preposition
at
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different
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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of day in
winter
and summer.
Overall
, the data reveals there were more tourists came to
museum
Add an article
the museum
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in summer, and the time they visited was later than
winter
Change preposition
in winter
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. In
winter
, people stopped visiting after 2:30 pm. In summer, at 9 am in the morning, the number of
tourist
Change to a plural noun
tourists
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increased dramatically, from 400 to 1,300
visitors
in 2 hours,
then
it reached a peak at 11:30, it became 1,500 visits which was the highest visit in whole day.
Then
it steadily dropped to 800
visitors
at 3:30 pm and became 0 person after 6 pm. In
winter
, the
visitors
slowly surged from 200 to 400
visitors
at 9 to 10 am. In the next two hours, there was a fructuation between 400 and 600 people,
then
, the number decreased smoothly from 600 to 0
visitors
at 2:30 pm.
Submitted by chaoweikevin on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words winter, visitors with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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