IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of passenger railway journey made in Great Bristain between 1950 and 2004/5. Summarize the information by selecting and report the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of passenger railway journey made in Great Bristain between 1950 and 2004/5. Summarize the information by selecting and report the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#passenger #railway #journey #bristain #information #report #features #comparisons
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The chart gives information about the quantity of passenger
trip
Fix the agreement mistake
trips
show examples
 by the railway
Correct your spelling
ruined
runned
Correct your spelling
run
 in Great
Bristain
Correct your spelling
Britain
 from 1950 to 2004/5. It can be seen that all of
National
Correct article usage
the National
show examples
rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
,
London
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 Underground and Light
rail
Use synonyms
 & metro systems have an increasing trend between 1950 and 2004/5. Speaking of
National
Correct article usage
the National
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rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
London
Correct article usage
the London
show examples
 Underground, during the period 1950 to 1983,
National
Correct article usage
the National
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rail
Use synonyms
network
Use synonyms
 went up lightly in 1960 (from 1000
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
 to over 1100
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
millions
) and
then
Linking Words
 it went down dramatically
about
Change preposition
to about
show examples
 under 650
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
 in 1983,
while
Linking Words
London
Use synonyms
 Underground remained stable until 1975 after that it reduced to under 500
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
 in 1983. In the period 1983 to 2004/5, there
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 an increase significantly in the number of National
rail
Use synonyms
network
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 and
London
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 Underground, the former rose to over 1050
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
millions
 and the latter rose to over 950
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
millions
. As regards Light
rail
Use synonyms
 & metro systems, It was
Correct your spelling
ruined
runned
Correct your spelling
run
show examples
 from about 1963 and in 1980 it did not create any
trip
Fix the agreement mistake
trips
show examples
. But after that, the Light
rail
Use synonyms
 & metro systems increased remarkably to over 150
Use synonyms
milions
Correct your spelling
million
millions
.
Submitted by weezel on

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rail, network, london, milions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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