School children and student of all ages now use technology a great deal in their studies. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Technology
plays
a crucial role Wrong verb form
has played
to support
Change preposition
in supporting
education
system of all school generations recently. Correct article usage
the education
This
essay will explain the advantages and disadvantages of technological materials
for studying.
Some parents and teachers believe that there is positive
development from using Add an article
a positive
technology
as a median method in teaching nowadays. Since,
people cannot avoid Remove the comma
apply
the
new innovations in the future, they better Correct article usage
apply
use
maximum
benefits of them. Correct article usage
the maximum
For instance
, instructors assign students to search for useful information from internet
for their report or research, and Add an article
the internet
also
teachers use
some info which are
generated by AI for students to analyse if the provided data are reliable or correct or not. In my point of view, Change the verb form
is
that is
the
great way to Correct article usage
a
explain
pupils that they need to consider deeply before accepting that information from Add the preposition
explain to
technology
or any other sources.
Although
some people agree to use
technological materials
in studies, others against
it. Add a missing verb
are against
This
group of people believes that the original and traditional methods of teaching are best
ways Correct article usage
the best
for learning
in school. There is a variety of knowledge in official coursebooks and textbooks. Change preposition
to learn
Furthermore
, they believe that technology
bring
Change the verb form
brings
the
negative impact Correct article usage
a
for
Change preposition
on
educational
system. When pupils can find information easily from websites or AI programs, it makes them to have less attempt Add an article
the educational
an educational
in finding
beneficial data by themselves. Other than that, it leads young generations to Change preposition
to find
have
Verb problem
make
lower
effort in analysing and considering Correct word choice
less
the
complex contexts. Correct article usage
apply
As a result
, technological materials
destroy the significant thinking processes which is the
important part Correct article usage
an
for
educational development.
In conclusion, no matter Change preposition
of
methods
parents and teachers Correct article usage
the methods
use
as a median
of studying, Correct your spelling
medium
technology
or traditional materials
. It really depends on communication from the person who teach
. In my opinion, the combination of techniques must be the greatest paramount. Actually, the underline of education is students gain knowledge and skills. Either Change the verb form
teaches
way
which Add a comma
way,
lead
to that wonderful result, I consider it as a successful procedure.Wrong verb form
led
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coherence cohesion
It is essential to ensure that your essay follows a clear and logical structure. Each paragraph should address a single main point, supporting it with examples or explanations. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the overall flow and understandability of the text.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, which is positive. However, work on making your thesis statement more prominent in the introduction, and ensure that your conclusion decisively restates your position and summarizes your main reasons.
coherence cohesion
Your main points need stronger support through the use of more specific examples, facts, or figures. Avoid overly broad statements and strive to anchor your arguments with concrete illustrations.
task achievement
In terms of task achievement, it's important to ensure that your response is complete and fully addresses the prompt. Your essay should directly answer the question of whether you perceive the increased use of technology in studies as a positive or negative development.
task achievement
To improve clarity and ensure ideas are comprehensive, focus on articulating your thoughts in a precise manner. Use specific, rather than generic, language, and ensure that your argumentative stance is clear from the beginning.
task achievement
Inclusion of relevant, specific examples will strengthen your essay significantly. Instead of simply stating that technology can have both positive and negative implications, illustrate these with real-world situations or hypothetical scenarios. This will give your argument more weight.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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