Some people believe that international sporting events contribute to world peace. Others argue that they only provide a temporary distraction. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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It is still a debatable issue regarding the effects of international sporting
events
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.
This
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essay will discuss both views on
this
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issue. In my opinion, whilst acknowledging that there are drawbacks, I believe that global sporting
events
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will contribute to
world
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peace
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. On the one hand, it may be true if sporting
events
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can be used as a tool to issue diversion, especially when it comes to chaotic conditions. The ability level of sporting
events
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is uncontested since they can reach a wider population in every country plus some of the sports types have clubs, making it more powerful for sporting
events
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to give another entertainment. Take Indonesia as an example. In 2023, Indonesia had democratic chaos
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of the presidential election. The governments used their guns and one of them aired FIFA’s football match. For about 4-5 days, the situation was under control because everyone was busy talking and analyzing the match performance.
On the other hand
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, the role of international sporting
events
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is way more far than that. Sporting tournaments can act as a nation unifier. Many sports types have their specific supporter club around the
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,
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it can facilitate
people
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to connect and foster networking based on liking the same club.
Additionally
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, international sporting tournaments can contribute to
world
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peace
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since they can gather
people
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from around the
world
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to sit and watch the tournaments together at one stadium, regardless of where ethnicity they come from or the language they use.
For instance
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, FIFA 2023 which was held in Qatar had a remarkable success in inviting more than 6 million
people
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around the
world
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for the final match.
As a result
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, international sporting
events
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can bring
peace
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to
this
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world
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since
people
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can interact with the unknown in a delightful situation.
To sum up
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, some
people
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argue that global sporting
events
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are only used as a distraction agent,
while
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others believe that the
events
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can contribute to
world
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peace
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. I agree with the latest statement since sporting
events
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can be a perfect platform for
people
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to meet the unknown.
Submitted by aidafathiaa on

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coherence cohesion
To improve your logical structure, you need to ensure that the points you are making are clearly linked and that the flow of your essay is easy to follow. This can be achieved by using cohesive devices effectively and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main point that is developed and expanded upon.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are clear and concise. They should provide a roadmap for your essay and reflect the trajectory of your argument, respectively. Avoid introducing new ideas in the conclusion and remember to restate your opinion clearly if it is requested in the task prompt.
coherence cohesion
To support your main points more effectively, integrate specific details and examples that are directly relevant to the arguments you're making. They should be used to illustrate and support your statements rather than simply to fill space.
task achievement
Complete the task by addressing all parts of the prompt and providing a balanced discussion of both sides of the issue before presenting your own opinion. Ensure that you present comprehensive ideas that fully address the topic, and avoid contradicting yourself within the essay.
task achievement
Have clear and comprehensive ideas by creating a strong thesis statement and topic sentences for each paragraph. Make sure that these are adequately developed and elaborated upon throughout the paragraph.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to support your discussion. Ensure that these examples are pertinent to the question and help to expand and clarify your points. Avoid generic examples that could apply to a range of topics; the more tailored your examples, the better your score will be.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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