Ambition is a positive quality for people to have in society today. How important is it for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?

#ambition #quality #people #society #life

Everyone has their own ambitions for what they want to achieve in life,

thrive

Correct word choice

and thrive

show examples

in various sectors to reach their goals. It should be aware of that excessive worries to fulfil the desire that might be harmful.

This

essay will shed light on both the benefits and drawbacks of

this

issue.

On the other hand

people

concerned

Add a missing verb

are concerned

show examples

about improving their lives

due to

people

becoming more educated and

also

there are a number of resources provided on the Internet. In order to succeed, it is genuinely important to make a daily schedule

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and follow that schedule strictly.

To reach

Change the verb form

Reaching

show examples

the goal is genuinely important for not only fame and success but

also

can improve self-esteem and confidence .

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

it is beneficial to reach the top in career paths

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and stand out at the highest level in society. The

last

and least is that the goal-oriented person gets admiration among society and is inspired by

people

who want to accomplish their desires.

On the other hand

due to

people

eagerly wanting to succeed, they can harm or trouble themselves with unawareness.

For example

one

Correct word choice

if one

show examples

person wants to have an ambition to get an award in their department, they would like to show off their performance to be noticed by higher levels that gain pressure. As

consequence

Correct article usage

a consequence

show examples

, they are not competing to achieve their goal but most likely conquer others.

Additionally

people

may suffer pain

whereas

compelling your abilities with others

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

can decrease self-worth and morality.

To conclude

, it could not be possible to deny that ambition is a necessity for everyone to build as a valuable person in society. But there should be awareness not to focus on popularity and

overwhelm

Wrong verb form

be overwhelmed

show examples

by pressure.

Submitted by cupidzunzun on Mon Jan 08 2024

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coherence cohesion

Improve the overall structure of the essay by having a clearer progression of ideas and more cohesive devices to guide the reader.

task achievement

Provide concrete examples and develop your ideas further to support your analysis effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

driving force
personal growth
professional growth
career advancement
resilience
setbacks
societal progress
innovation
economic growth
ethical considerations
life satisfaction
burnout
unethical behavior

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Ambition is a positive quality for people to have in society today. How important is it for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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