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Writing Samples
Band 5

Schools should ue films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#schools #ue #films #computers #games #books
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In the present epoch, some parents opine that movies and computerized
games
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 should be utilized in schools
,
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 and that books should be obsolete. I am a staunch believer that these materials are completely pivotal
in addition
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 to being inevitable mainly after the advent of
new
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the new
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 technology era. All these points will be discussed later in
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with, using computers in
the
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favor of explaining lectures plays a quintessential role in widening the horizon of the learners.
This
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 means that short movies displayed on the screen are more comprehended than written words in the
text books
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textbooks
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 because of the addition of both visual and auditory effects. A prime example of
this
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 is some international schools in Egypt that have replaced the papers with computerized hard discs.
Hence
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, excessive utilization of the modern technological devices
enhances
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 the rate of interaction within the curriculum.
Furthermore
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,
games
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 should be exploited by the tutors to groom
the
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future generations. In other words, different kinds of them should be held, either video
games
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 or
the
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real competitions, because these generate the spirit of racing among students.
For instance
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, a popular television program named "
the genius
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The Genius
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" is based on testing the students so as to develop their cognitive functions.
Therefore
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, rivalry should be introduced in the syllabi as an information game to anchor data to undergraduates' minds. In conclusion,
after
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this
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 essay has manifested the points mentioned above, it can be reiterated that the usage of movies, computers, and
not to mention
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the
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games
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 is critically essential in the progress of
the
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academic achievements.
Thus
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, I am still convinced that the educational authorities are obligated to insert various advanced teaching tools to cope with the rapidly developing world.
Submitted by Halakilany3 on

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coherence cohesion
Maintain clear topic sentences and a logical paragraph structure to guide the reader effortlessly through your argumentation. Avoid overly complex sentences, as they may hinder the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Your introduction should clearly state your view and briefly introduce the points that you will discuss. Each body paragraph should have a clear central idea that is elaborated, exemplified, and explained. Conclusions should summarize the main points and restate your position clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traditional
  • interactive
  • visual stimulation
  • engagement
  • accessibility
  • retention
  • educational
  • comprehension
  • academic success
  • attention span
  • prohibitive
  • balanced approach
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