In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweight the advantages?
In today’s digital world, more and more people use
smartphones
on a daily basis. Although
there are some concerns about smartphone
addiction, I believe the benefits that smartphones
bring such
as convenience and connection far outweigh the concerns.
The majority of people use smartphone
because they help improve Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
overall
information. Firstly
, it can be seen that the most vital quality of smartphone
is Correct article usage
a smartphone
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
comfortable
when Replace the word
comfort
it
size is quite small so it Change the pronoun
its
easy
for user to bring it to everywhere they want to connect with their modern life example Add a missing verb
is easy
like
chatting, connecting Change preposition
apply
and
working or studying online.
Another point worth considering is that having Correct word choice
apply
smartphone
or some modern techniques Add an article
a smartphone
mean
the users Correct subject-verb agreement
means
are accessed
Wrong verb form
access
in
the internet which can Change preposition
apply
easy
connect everyone, who Change the word
easily
use
Correct subject-verb agreement
uses
smartphone
around the world Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
and
Correct word choice
apply
also
it provide
a wide range of benefits for the user like searching and sharing data, Change the verb form
provides
give
us the wide range of information about what we want to know and we can save a lot of time for working and studying by using internet.
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
However
, some people argue that smartphone
or Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
internet
have a lot of Correct article usage
the internet
problem
with Fix the agreement mistake
problems
the
Correct article usage
apply
user
like Fix the agreement mistake
users
the
Correct article usage
apply
criminal
who take our information in difficult Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
way
or Fix the agreement mistake
ways
Add a missing verb
have the
the
negative impact Correct article usage
a
with
Change preposition
on
the
young children when they watch some Correct article usage
apply
clip
which do not fit in with their ages.
Fix the agreement mistake
clips
Smartphones
are easy to become addicted if we do not control ourselves properly, but with effort, we can benefit from the convenience and the connection of the
smartphones
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should outline the main points you will discuss, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your argument. The absence of a clear conclusion can affect the coherence of your essay.
supported main points
Develop each main point in distinct paragraphs, and provide clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. Elaborate your points with specific examples or evidence to support your arguments.
complete response
Although the response addresses the topic, make sure to give a complete response by not only mentioning the advantages and disadvantages but also weighing them against each other. This could include a deeper analysis of how the benefits may lessen the impact of the drawbacks.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on providing clarity in the ideas presented. Make sure not to deviate from the topic and keep the flow of the essay coherent with transition phrases.
relevant specific examples
The use of specific examples is good but they need to be more relevant and developed. Use anecdotes, studies, or personal experiences that clearly illustrate the point you are making.
logical structure
Maintain a logical structure by organizing your essay into clear paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs. This will enhance clarity and cohesiveness.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.