In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweight the disadvangtages?
Nowadays,almost
people
Correct determiner usage
all people
is
used to Change the verb form
are
smartphone
. Because Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
is
an essential human Verb problem
apply
object
for communication and work. But spending a large amount of time using Fix the agreement mistake
objects
smartphone
can lead to health Add an article
a smartphone
problem
. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
This
essay will discuss its advantages and this
Correct determiner usage
the
advangtages
Correct your spelling
advantages
advantage
about
Change preposition
of
this
problem.
On the one hand, smartphone
help Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
search
Correct pronoun usage
us search
Change preposition
for everythings
everythings
which we find. Correct your spelling
everything
Moreover
, it help
us in our work Change the verb form
helps
such
as contact, chat, email
to support Correct word choice
and email
we
work. Teenagers can learn many things regarding their Correct pronoun usage
our
study
. Fix the agreement mistake
studies
For example
, we can relax on
on the Change preposition
apply
smartphone
after a day of studying and working. Due to
we have possitive
energy in the afternoon.
Correct your spelling
positive
On the other hand
, there are some teenagers such
as students are playing
Wrong verb form
play
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
insted
of Correct your spelling
instead
study
. Wrong verb form
studying
Beside
, studying is getting worse and worse, sometimes I don't want to study. They spend time on Replace the word
Besides
smartphone
playing games which increases health diseases Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
such
as obesity, Correct word choice
and eyes
eyes
problems.
Change the noun form
eye
To
conclusion, everybody has a mobile phone. It has advantages Change preposition
In
such
as provide
information to the students regarding studies. It has Wrong verb form
providing
also
many disadvantages such
as using an excess mobile phone can lead to obesity. So we should allocate reasonable time between watching the phone and working.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each of these should serve a specific purpose within the essay, with the introduction setting the scene for the argument, the body presenting the advantages and disadvantages in separate paragraphs, and the conclusion summarizing the argument and giving a clear opinion or recommendation.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to manage the logical progression of information throughout the essay. This includes linking words and phrases for contrasting points (however, on the other hand, although, etc.), sequencing ideas (firstly, secondly, finally, etc.), and referencing ideas (this, such, it refers to, etc.).
support
Ensure that each main point in your argument is adequately supported by specific examples or explanations. Avoid general statements that do not substantiate the arguments made. Use relevant examples to illustrate each advantage and disadvantage you discuss.
task response
Address all parts of the task adequately, ensuring that the essay responds to the question fully by discussing both advantages and disadvantages and concluding with a clear opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The answer must be relevant and fully expanded upon.
clarity
Strive for clarity and simplicity in your writing to ensure that your ideas are comprehensible and straightforward. Avoid overly complex or unclear sentences that could confuse the reader or obscure the meaning of your points.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?